Haunted by seeing my dad die

Yesterday I thought I was going round to help change my dad's bed sheets only to see my dad staring at the ceiling taking shallow breaths every 10 seconds I phoned emergency services and they was brilliant and arrived just as I got off the phone, my dad passed about 40 mins after but all I see is his face with his eyes and mouth open it was soo traumatic I just keep crying as the sight just keeps appearing. The whole thing from being told he was end of life and had 6 to 12 months to be gone within weeks as all been overwhelming. I'm sorry if I seem like I'm babbling but I just need to get this feeling down and out I can't close my eyes as its the first thing I see, and I just keep replaying it over in my head then the guilt of was there anything else I could have done.

  • Hi Leilei

    No there is nothing more you could have done. 

    Turn this around and at least be thankful you were there and he was not alone.  The memory will fade but won't go completely, try to replace it with happy ones.

     

  • I'm so sorry for your loss,the same thing happened to me with my dad,it's terrible I know but you have to stay strong how I coped with it is I looked back at all the good times I had with him also remember him on how he used to look like,there is nothing else you could have don,I also thought what else I could have done,the paramedics took over and there was nothing I could have done more x

  • I'm so so sorry.   Go and get some photographs of him now and remember him as he used to be so that those are the memories you have.  
     

    Please understand there is nothing you could have done.  Honestly nothing.  
     

    Xx

  • Bless your heart.

    He is most likely to have not been aware of his situation.

    He would have known you were there. So would have been comforted by that and that you were getting the right support x

    Its over for him now he is at peace. Its hard for us left behind as we relive it over and over. Make sure you get sone support to process it all xx

    Lots of love x