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Words of Comfort from anyone please.

LizaP
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My lovely dad passed away last May, I was on my own with him because my brother couldn't hack it. I stayed with him holding his hand right until the end 9pm to 11ish. He looked over at me about twenty minutes before he took his last breath and I said to him "its ok dad I'm not going anywhere, I'll be here for as long as you want me, your stuck with me" then his heart just stopped beating. I knew immediately he'd gone to be with his loved ones. Everyone say's it gets easier but I'm struggling inside, my heart actually feels pain. He was my best friend, confidant. He was my mum and Dad because he raised me, when my mum suddenly left when I was aged 10. I'm having hypnotherapy counselling which kinda helps. But I'm over in Spain for a week sorting out his probate. And my brother  wants his house in England and Spain sold as he wants the money. And I'm the one he's leaving to deal with everything. He couldn't even be bothered to help with our dads funeral arrangements. It feels like piece by piece anything linked to my dad is being gotten rid of. Because he wasn't particularly close with him. Whereas my dad was a huge part of mine and my childrens daily life. This pain is unbearable, just wish I could hug, hold and talk to my dad for one last time. Hope there is Heaven as I can't wait to see him again. It bloody hurts! 

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    Hi I know it is very difficult,I was also with my dad when he passed away and my boyfriend tried to do cpr but it didn't work try to stay strong I know in time it does get easier,it always happens with siblings they don't help but they are always around when money is involved x

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    Hello LizaP

    I am so sorry to hear of the sad loss of your much loved dad my heart goes out to you.  It is still early days for you.

    I lost my loved dad from Oesophagus cancer on Christmas Day 2014.  He was 84 yrs old.  I still miss him so much.  I was with him when he passed away at home.  My soulmate, my husband supported me and dad.  I would never have coped without my husband.  

    My soulmate my husband passed away from Junctional Oesophagus cancer on his own dad's birthday September 2016.  My heart is broken.  I was with him holding him when he passed away in our local hospice along with our daughter.

    I am so sorry for the difficulties with your brother.  I too experienced difficulties with my own siblings during my dad's illness and passing.  

    My own family has broken since the death of my husband.  My heart is broken I am devastted by this and will never understand why or how this has happened. 

    I don't think you ever get over the loss of such profound losses.  I feel you just find ways of coping slowly and in your own way and in your own time.  I have good days and bad days.  I promised my husband I would carry on living and would always take him with me where ever I went and with whatever I do,  He is in my heart never gone as is my dad, my mum and my brother.  All who have passed.  I find this forrum and expressing feelings with others who have been through such losses a comfort and help. I also have good friends and family that are such a treasure and are always there whenever I need them.  I know I am lucky in so many ways.

    Your dearest dad knew how much you loved him and that you were always there and you did everthing you could as you are continuing to do now,  I hope you support too and find this forum a support also.

    He will never be gone nothing can take away the love you have for him and all the memories you made.  He will I am sure be looking down proud of you now and wanting you to live and make more memories with your children just like he did with you his little girl who turned into a loving caring lady and mum.

    I am certain we will one day be reunited with our loves ones.  They would want us to carry on and take them with us on our journeys making memories, they will be looking down.

    I send you a virtual hug and best wishes to you and your children take care xx

     

  • Offline in reply to Leigh60

    Thankyou so much for your kind words,it must be very difficult for you too we all have our memories and we have to keep strong also for our kids,I also lost my mum and sister then my dad,6 months later I was diagnosed with cancer but thank goodness I'm rid of it now,so whatever is thrown at is we have to deal with it we never forget our loved ones and they will always be forever in our hearts,take care of yourself x

  • Offline in reply to fifa

    Hello fifa

    I am so sorry for the loss of your dad, mum and sister and to read that you yourself was diagnosed with this awful disease.  Its heartwarming and such good news to read that you have recovered.  Your family will be looking down on you very proud im sure and as you say they will alwaus be forever in our hearts.

    I wish you much happiness and continued good health carry your faimly in your heart and live a full life making many more special memories.  You take care of your always too and thank you so much for your caring kindness.  vitual hugs xx

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    Hi,

    I am so sorry for your loss. I too lost my father at the age of 52 in Sep 21, diagnosed in Aug 21. I'm still in shock but can take comfort in knowing his not in pain anymore. I to had to deal with the estate on my own whilst heavily pregnant but tried to get it done asap as found it hard going over everything eachtime and just wanted it done.

    Hold on to the memories, he will be looking down on you for sure.

    X 

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