I lost my nanna 2 years ago, she lived alone. I felt guilty everytime I left her. I wish I could say it gets easier but I learnt even though other family members and overnight carers were there I still felt guilty I wasn't there. The night she passed away I had finished work and gone home to get changed when my sister rang to say she had gone. That to this day hurts that I wasn't there. I haven't grieved as she passed away in the January, I had a baby in the August and then my dad was diagnosed with liver cancer. My dad is getting worse day by day. He got told he wouldn't see August last year but is still with us. I know it's hard but try not to feel guilty hun. Try to do a plan with family so someone is there everyday. I know its easier said then done especially with covid. Try not to bully yourself to much. Life has to go on and can't be put on hold. You need time to. X

I'm so sorry to read about your nan. I can relate to you so much. My grandad got diagnosed with stage 4 lung cancer in November and his prognosis was 3-6 month. He's still capable of doing day to day things but I visit him everyday and I too have massive anxiety and guilt when I leave. My biggest fear is 'is this the last time I will see him'. My head runs away with me and I get myself in such a state. I am totally crushed as he is my world and more like a dad than a grandad. I'm so scared for what's to come, I have no idea how to cope. Take care x