Hello Sugarplm, 

I am so sorry to hear about your boyfriend's mum. It does sound like the news has had a very deep effect on your boyfriend and that he is trying to deal with the shock of it all by being on his own and keeping away from those he loves the most. Perhaps he doesn't want you to see him in a frail state; it is really hard to know the reasons really unless he himself is willing to talk about them. So there isn't really much you can do other than show him that you are there for him even if it has to be from a distance. Sometimes little gestures can go a long way and the most important thing is that you keep communicating well with him. It's really hard for anyone really to tell you how long you should give him or what to do in these difficult circumstances as only you know what your boyfriend is like and how best to interact with him. I think you are doing the right thing in giving him space and it's good that you two are still in touch and texting so that you can make sure this way that he knows you are there for him. It's important though that you look after your own wellbeing too and that you make sure this is not making you feel more depressed or anxious. If it does, then it's important that you focus on yourself too and maybe speak to your GP about how you are feeling at the moment.

I hope that things get better for you and your boyfriend soon. 

Best wishes, 

Lucie, Cancer Chat Moderator