Angry Daughter

Hi there again. My terminally ill Daughter is still refusing to see or speak to me. She is still in the hospice and apparently they can't discuss her case with me without her permission, so I haven't a clue how she is coping.  She has been bottling this up for a while now so I suppose it doesnt come as a great surprise other than I don't know what Ive done other than be there for her. I feel like the punch bag she needs to allow her to release her tensions. I understand her anger at the world as she is only young with a small son who she also won't see. Has anyone else out there experienced anything similar. 

  • Sorry for what you are going through, your daughter sounds quite young, especially as young child is in the picture 

    Although the Hospice can NOT discuss your daughter case with you without permission, perhaps its time to chat to the Hospice about what you think is happening and how you feel.

    Sometimes Hospices have ongoing support groups in places for families, to allow for increased understanding of the range of emotional involved.

     

    Use the forum for support for youself at this difficult time.

     

    Best Wishes 

     

    Tom   

  • Thanks Tom. She is actually in her 30s. Far too young to face this death sentence 

    I Must admit that I have considered using hospice councellor to help me face this problem 

  • Hi there ...

    Just a thought , but if she doesn't want to see her child too. . . It just maybe she's not strong enough to see you both ... as someone with cancer, I can so understand that ... it is hard for us to get our heads round things ... so I cannot imagine how hard this is on her ...

    Maybe you could write a letter, to say you will do as she wishes, but you want her to know how much you love her .. and if ever she does want to see you .. youll be there ....her daughter may need you now ... as she's loosing a mum ... so you could give her some comfort giving her a big nanny hug ... I know my grandkids mean the world to me ... and I'm sure your daughter would love to know her daughter has a hand to hold ..  a letter can say so much ... and esp if it's filled with love ...

    As parents we have to love our kids unconditionally... they didn't ask to be born ... so we must allow them to do things their way ..  so from one mum and nan to another ... I'm sending you a vertual hug.... Chrissie x

  • Hi chriss. 

    Thankyou for your reply and I will take on board your suggestion. My grandchild is an adorable little boy who weve spent a lot of time with but being as his mum and dad have split he is at his dads at the moment. This isnt a problem as we keep in touch but cant actually hug him at the moment due to corona virus. Yes it must be so hard for her to cope with all this. You say we love our kids unconditionally and I agree.