Hi, I have posted a few times giving updates on my husbands condition, but 3 weeks ago we were told that there was no more treatment available and things were coming to an end. The hospital and hospice were wonderful, supplying us with equipment and we now have carers coming in four times a day,(although I'm cutting that back to twice). During the day he sits in an easy chair, chatting, drinking tea or just napping, we have equipment for me to move him around and I can cope.BUT then comes bed time, we have a hospital bed in the downstairs bedroom and I sleep on an air bed beside him, well I say sleep, it's as though as soon as he gets into bed his personality changes. He calls out for me, I crawl off my air bed and ask what I can do, 'nothing' he says, I sort out his bed clothes 'stop doing that', I reset his pillows 'you're making things worse'. I crawl back into bed and he starts again. On average I'm up 7/8 times a night, and can do no right. Except when I get him to the loo, or clear up after violent diarrhoea, and even then it's my fault. I love him dearly and can't stand the thought of losing him, but I'm exhausted and am now struggling to cope.
Vent over, thank you for reading this. I am strong and will get through this.
