husband's cancer has made him nasty

I really hope this doesn;t sound selfish, and the main reason I am posting this is to see if anyone else has had the same experience and if so how they coped, and in fact if they coped, becuase I'm struggling and ready to give up.

We were married only 8 months ago and my husband had his cancer diagnosis six weeks later. a shock of course.  Since then he has been dismissive and cruell and downright nasty.  I have my own medical issue which in no way am I comparing, but following some bad news about that yesterday he has today told me that I am medically trying to 'trump' him and take the attention away from him (even though I haven't told anyone else).  He tells me that I am not nice enough or good enough to look after him and that our relationship has to go 'on hold' until he decides otherwise.  If I try and keeps things 'normal' I'm accused of not caring and if I try and talk about it and see how he's doing I'm drawing attention to it and being a *** about it.  Not once has he bothered to see if I'm ok (I have an elderley mum who needs support, and autistic son and a full time job.  If I say I'm in need of a walk with the dog on my own I'm neglecting him.  He had a procedure two days ago (day surgery) and i genuinely feel that it would have been better for everybody if he hadnt survived the anaesthetic.  There, I said it.  I'm a kind and compassionate person and try and give any help to anyone but being hated and critisized and spoken down to day in day out is very challenging, actually I just want to cry but I'm too busy. Thinking about it he has become an abuser.  If I don't challenge his abuse then I am an enabler.  I'm just wondering if cancer has done this to other men, or if he's just decided to show his true colours?

 

Parents
  • Hi there makes me feel so comforted to read your post.My husbands moods are getting so hard to live with, he says it's my actions that make him the way he is.I try my best but nothing is good enough.It is mentally and physically draining treading on eggshells everyday.Some days he can be the most loving man then it can all change in a heartbeat and i'm the worst person ever.He has been told he's allowed to be selfish.I try to arrange trips to make memories but he dosn't want to deal with everyday life that not how he wants to end his life 

Reply
  • Hi there makes me feel so comforted to read your post.My husbands moods are getting so hard to live with, he says it's my actions that make him the way he is.I try my best but nothing is good enough.It is mentally and physically draining treading on eggshells everyday.Some days he can be the most loving man then it can all change in a heartbeat and i'm the worst person ever.He has been told he's allowed to be selfish.I try to arrange trips to make memories but he dosn't want to deal with everyday life that not how he wants to end his life 

Children
  • Hi i saw your post and just had to reply, no way is he allowed to be selfish,who ever told him that hasn't got a clue , I've been living with cancer over 6years im also a carer for my wife,we have odd rows about  things but soon sorted and back to normal, there's no need to be grumpy to you if he starts just go out the way he's mobile and working which is good, like you said probably in denial .

    Hope you can get something sorted over his moods.

    Good luck.

    Billy

  • Whoever told him he is allowed to be selfish needs to be made aware of the impact this has had on his behaviour - assuming he's not just making this up.

    Cancer brings out the best in some people and the worst in others. 

    You seem to be in a lose-lose situation - maybe he needs some counselling to help him recognise the damage he is doing? 

  • How are things now? I could have written your post, going through exactly the same thing at the moment. counsellors don't have a clue what it's like, at least there are people here who can relate.