Hi why is she so sure she's going to die, or is she just trying to make sure your certain she's the one for you, women have different ideas about things as you're probably finding out the hard way, you'll just have to keep with her till she relaxes with you it'll take time, my wife is a good bit older than me i had to chase after her for years, we've now been married over 45 years we've had health problems on both sides but you get through it good luck and best wishes.

Billy

P.s hopefully a lady will reply with ideas 

Thanks for your advice Billy - I think as we haven’t been going out long she feels a bit apprensive it’s just knowing the right things to say 

It not what to say it's more to keep things normal, give her time to settle and relax with you,, her C could come back, you could get C, no body knows what the future holds for you both, best wishes for you both in the future, 

Billy

P.s [@Chriss]‍ ‍ might be able to help you 

Hello,

it sounds to me she is laying all her cards on the table, no secrets....it's early days in your relationship and I agree that I would probably do the same.....in other words...here it is...if you can't handle it I'd rather you go now, billy is right...she's making sure you can hack it.....

Theres no reason why she can't have years ahead of her...if you are serious about her the only way to show her is to listen and try and understand where she's coming from...a cancer diagnosis is a shot across the bows....be patient xxxx

Hi there ..

I'm not sure I can help much .. but I'll give you my thoughts ..

Once we get cancer, it sits on our shoulders ... like it's just waiting .. we never move away from it, we learn to live with that really scary thought .. 

By what you've said , I can see one of two scenarios... one is she just can't let anyone in that close .. because in her head that's too painful to contemplate loving someone and putting them that just be heartache to come ..for you both .. believe me it's harder for us with cancer to see what loved ones go through when their with us and that feeling they have of being helpless to make it better ..

She may care that much for you already ... so by her pushing you away, she's thinking she is solving a future problem .. that's been done so many times ..

If I were you I'd sit down with just her and tell her none of us have tomorrow for sure .. cancer or fit and well .. tomorrow could be anyone's last day .. and that you'd like to make a lifetime of memories in every day you have .. it's all about living in the day .. living for that day ..

And listen to all her thoughts .. without interrupting... don't say "it's o.k" don't say "it won't happen" don't promise tomorrow... just ask for today .. and every day your blessed with .. tell her life without her is a worse pain then working through this ... you can't make it better .. you can't make her thoughts go away .. but if you can love her enough to live with them .. both admit your scared ..

But at the end of the day... it's her choice .. once you have listened to each other .. give her space to choose ... if it's meant to be .. she'll come back ... but whatever happens know how she really feels .. say what's in your heart after hers too .. 

I wish you all the luck in the world .. and hope you both the best in whatever path you both take ..

Chrissie xx

Beautifully put chriss.....as always xxxxx

Hi Chrissie

Thank you for your beautiful words. I talked, listened to my girlfriend and held her tightly while we talked about our hopes and fears. I can’t thank you enough for your words and how they have helped. 

I have so much love for her, my heart melts every time I’m with her and I think she feels the same so we take each day as it comes

Thank you again xxxx