Cancer Research UK main site
  • Replies 2 replies
  • Views 184 views
  • Users 0 members are here

Oesophageal Cancer stage 4

Cassier
Offline

Hi Everyone

I have only joined this site tonight in hope to discuss Oesophageal Cancer stage 4. My sister was diagnosed July this year and I am her main and only carer. It has been like a tidal wave ever since her diagnosis. My sister has gone back to work full time and after her 3rd session of chomo and CT scan she was told the spots on her lungs and stomach have disappeared along with the lymph nodes that have shrunk. Every step of the way the information has been extremely vague and my sister now thinks she has gone back to stage 3 as she has knocked 3 of the cancer's on the head. I feel her expectations are not being managed properly or personalised to her cancer by the oncologist. I am now beside myself and signed off by my GP with stress. I feel so alone right now, as the doctors keep telling me that they need permission to discuss any of my sister's treatment with me. My life goes on hold every time she goes into hospital and it feels like I am the outsider.

I have a meeting next week with a Werllbeing representative my GP recommended to discuss all my concerns.

  • Offline

    Hi Cassier,

    So sorry to hear about your sister's diagnosis. Have you discussed with her whether you might sit in with her to support her during her appointments? Most hospitals will encourage this as it improves communications - many patients mishear, misunderstand or block out much of the information we are given. I normally take my wife in with me but at times have taken one of my sons - who just happens to be a doctor. They often think up different questions to ask than I might have done. 

    If your sister doesn't want you with her you'll just have to respect that but there's nothing to stop you mentioning your concerns about her misunderstandings to them. 

    I have the same type of cancer and by coincidence have had a similar response to chemo but I know and have been told by various doctors in no uncertain terms that cancer staging is a one way street. I was diagnosed at stage 4 and, however much my mets have shrunk, I know I will always be at stage 4. 

    This isn't an easy new reality to accept and your sister may have gone back to work simply to cling onto some sort of normality for as long as she can. I did something similar and I only stopped working when the cumulative effects of the chemo were too exhausting to carry on working. 

    I hope things work out for you and your sister and that your counselling helps you recover some of your emotional and psychological wellbeing. 

    Best wishes

    Dave

     

     

     

  • Offline in reply to davek

    Hi Dave

    So sorry to hear about your diagnosis too.

    My sister is acting as if her cancer diagnosis is going back a stage or two and is now running around doing 2 jobs again.

    I doubt if there are many people on their 4th session of chemo going out doing takeaway deliveries in all weather for £5 an hour when the point has been made by going back to working full time hours for the NHS,

    I am worried and fed up that the medical team are not giving her facts. I did attend her last oncology appointment and ones before but after that there is no support. We have had one MacMillan nurse go off sick long term, the oncologist is moving departments and its all a real shambles 

Speak to a nurse

Quick links

Follow us

Registered with Fundraising Regulator (logo)
Cancer Research UK is a registered charity in England and Wales (1089464), Scotland (SC041666), the Isle of Man (1103) and Jersey (247). A company limited by guarantee. Registered company in England and Wales (4325234) and the Isle of Man (5713F). Registered address: 2 Redman Place, London, E20 1JQ.