Hi you could contact your local hospice they will give you advice on help available you may have to be referred theres the mcmillan helpline they will transfer you to spk to nurse  but then again you have to ask dont wait for your own mental state alone hope thats helped paul

Hello Boggit64; welcome to the forum.  It is so difficult to watch the person you love in pain and be unable to do anything that would help.  I imagine you would take his pain if you could.  If your husband is lucid and saying he does not want help then I fear all you can do is watch and worry.  Fortunately Thursday is not far off and you can talk with the specialist about your concerns.  So sorry that there is no easy way through this.  Annie