Hello Jasonf1983.  What awful news.  I hope your mum is getting the necessary care.  It is awful to see someone you love in pain - perhaps you could speak to her doctor and ask about better pain relief?  If you are not clear about any aspect of the care she is/should be receiving then I would suggest you either ring the nurses on this website (Freefone 0808 808 4040 9am-5pm Mon-Fri) or MacMillan Cancer Support (Freefone 0808 808 0000 weekdays 9am-8pm) as either will give you advice about where to get the extra help your stepmum needs.

Also please look after yourself (both you and other close family members) as it is not easy watching a loved one gradually slipping away.  Share your feelings and help each other as much as possible.  And come back here as often as you feel you want to do so.  Annie

Since writing this my step mum as gotten worse.she can not move on her own and her organs have shut down apart from her lungs and heart.she is in a hospital bed at home on a cathater and a syringe driver.also been given pnr sedaten.dr said we need to keep my step mum comfortable and only days left to live and that family should say there final goodbyes.im very devasted.

I am sorry to hear this; you expected to have your stepmum with you for a bit longer than this.  She is at least passing her final days at home with the people who love her.  And hopefully the syringe driver means that she is not suffering pain.  It is believed that hearing is the last sense to stop functioning so do keep talking to your stepmum even though she cannot respond.  I know it is a heartbreaking time for your family but you can take comfort from being able to help her pass over without pain and as she wanted.    Annie

My step mum passed away peacefully Sunday night