hubby has been given about 12 months had bowel cancer that has spread to both of his lungs and now has spread to his abdomen. as a partner it us really hard to cope with
Hi,
So sorry to hear of your hubbys diagnosis. My husband was diagnosed with liver cancer 4 amd a half years ago. They said his life span would be about 5 years. Yes it is so hard but you do learn to cope. Something just seems to take over to give you the strength and the courage to carry on. Take each day as it comes. There will be bad days for your hubby which yes it will affect you but there will also be good days. Cherish each of these good times. Just be there with a ready smile and a hug. You have made a step forward by joining this forum. My thoughts and prayers are with you both. Feel free to speak to me at any time.
Lynn x
That is a question that I have as well! My boyfriend has been diagnosed with cholangiocarcinoma (bile duct cancer) that has matasasized to his liver and his bones! Prognosis is usually 6 months from presenting! So with that timeline I am looking at the end of March! I hope I am wrong! I would really like to know how to deal as well!
I dont have a partner with a terminal diagnosis but i did have a 35 year old son who had bowel cancer, with liver mets in all his liver diagnosed beginning of May 2017 and died 19 January 2017 ten days after his 35 birthday. The journey from May to that day in January, was hard, emotional, we tried to make as many memories with him and his new wife. We would go out for days , myself and husband, his two sisters, brother in law, baby newphew and his wife, as long he was able we did things, he had an aston martin driving experience. He and his wife had a few days being spoiled at Gleneagles. We all went to ~Aviemore for the weekend a fortnight before he died. I would say do as much as your partner can, take photos and videos and make sure you catch some of them talking. That gives me some joy even though it makes me cry hearing his voice. I dont think you can cope with this you endure the journey the highs and lows and eventually when the time comes, learn how to live a life without them. Still not got that hang of that, still cant really accept that I shall never see my son again, he used to pop in everyday on his way home from work. So this may not be of any help to you, but get all the help you can, the MacMillan nurses are so good, the Maggie centres are very helpful and have an amazing aura of calm about them. Take heart my friends in this battle against this evil disease. love to you all.xx lesliexxx
Hi and welcome to the forum though always sad to see others facing the journey you and your hubby are now on. My husband was terminally diagnosed from diagnosis (mesothelioma) and we were told there was no specific timeline as there are many variables as to palliative care/treatments/medication. It was an emotional rollercoaster which I 'managed' by taking all help that was offered and sought help myself when I flet overwhelmed (this was hard as I felt it should be my responsibility to be there 24/7 but its just not practical.
Advice is difficult to offer as people all deal differently with their own personal feelings as well as those of the sufferer. All I can say is that as a wife I learned (eventually) to listen to what my husband wanted and did all I could, along with the family, to honour those wishes even when they would upset me. We carried on doing as much normal day to day things as and when they were possible, we continued to make plans and only cancelled if it became necessary. Whilst we were open in our hearts that time was limited we coped the best we could and I had the support of this forum for nearly 3 years before his journey came to its end. It is now 2 years since he passed away and I am still on the forum drawing strength from my 'buddies' as well as having general chats. I hope you find being here helps in some way. I found it helped to vent my feelings and gave me extra understanding by talking to others who were going or who had gone through similar times. Jules54
I am so sorry to hear about your hubby, as I am going through the end stages of Stage 4 Non-Small Cell Lung Cancer with my husband. My husband was diagnosed in June of 2016 with cancer in his lung pleura that had metastasized to his chest wall, so surgery was not possible. Since chemo did not stop the spread of the cancer, radiation was used to stop the pain in the metastasized areas, but further spread to the diaphragm has occurred. My husband tried Tercentriq infusion, but suffered a severe reaction that almost killed him, so now, the only thing available is hospice. The way I have coped through this horrible ordeal is to fully rely on God. My husband and I have talked about the treatments, side effects, and the inevitable outcome from the onset, and have cried together while holding each other tight. Coping isn't easy for anyone, but relying on God definately gives me and my husband the courage to cope. We spend each day as normal as possible, amid the pain, meds, etc., but we still hug and kiss each other, hold each others' hand, and kiss each other good night. Before I turn over to sleep at night, I thank the Lord for another day that he has given me to be with my husband. Best of luck to you and your husband, may the Lord be with you both.
I thank you for your response! We never did have time to do all that stuff as from the time he presented to now has been so short a time and with me also being disabled we have not been able to do much! His pain has been so unbelievable from the start! I haven't really had anytime to adjust! He went down hill so fast!
I am so sorry to read your post. My heart goes out to you. Hope you have family and friends to support you. No words to make anything better but love from a stranger.xx
