Hi, Anna, so sorry to hear of your mum's diagnosis.    Over the years I have cared for many of my family, and I know how hard it is, but rarely has anyone asked me how I coped.  I am sure it isnt because they don't care, they just don't know what to say to help.

You say you cant go out for long because of her pain and, Idon't know if this would be appropriate, but when my mother got to the stage when walking was difficult our hospital lent us a wheelchair.  It was good to get her round the shops at Christmas (even though she said I was worse pushing a wheelchair than I was at driving a car).  

You don't have to be strong all the time and maybe your mum doesnt need you to be. A little cuddle and a few tears between you might help.  I have incurable cancer and went to see a new GP yesterday.  I had been told she wasnt particularly caring but as soon as I went through the door she gave me a hug, asked how I was and gave me a box of tissues because I was in tears by then!  Most people don't get beyond asking 'how are you'. because they think tears mean they have upset you, whereas they are a release of emotions.

I hope that you can find some peac. - I am sure your mum loves having you there.  Best wishes. 

Just wanted to tell you, I know exactly how you feel, I am there now too, it's simply awful. Don't exactly feel any Christmas spirit, I feel jealousy towards everyone else who is celebrating, my mum told me she feels jealous even seeing people walking. Much love to you, take care of yourself, Sarah xx