Hello, I had to respond to your post as I have been through the exact same thing as you are going through now. My dad has had prostate cancer for 15 years and has had all the treatment under the sun! In November 2013 he had his first lot of chemo as the other treatments weren't doing the job anymore, and like you say the chemo isn't a cure, but is supposed to keep the cancer at bay for as long as poss. My dad finished his first round of chemo in about March last year and we had a lovely spring and summer and autumn with him in pretty good shape - he then started it again in December last year when the dreaded cancer came calling again. I don't know your family situation, or even how old your dad is or how long he's had prostate cancer, but I do understand what you're going through as it seems I'm a year or so ahead of you on the journey...  I'm happy to listen to your worries and share mine! My dad didn't respond well to the latest batch of chemo and it has been stopped - but that doesn't mean the same will happen with your dad. My advice to you would be (and it's very cliche) to take every day as it comes and to enjoy ordinary things with your dad. In my experience your emotions and reactions seem to adapt to every new scenario that cancer throws at you, when I first heard the words "dad's got to have chemo" I though I'd collapse there and then, but before long I was used to it and went with him a couple of times to give my mum a break. Then I got used to hearing the phrase "dad's got to have a blood transfusion" - you truly do find a strength you thought you didn't have in these situations. I also have friends who, although I know they care, are either scared to confront parental mortality so shy away from it, or truly just don't know what to say... Best wishes and good luck with the chemo to your dad (and you).

Hello Kessygirl,

Thank you so much for your reply. This forum has helped no end. I can echo everything that you have said in your post. 

It seems as though your Dad has been fighting this disease for longer than mine. My Dad was diagnosed in November 2011 and to begin with he had several hormonal treatments and now the chemo. He will be 65 in April and we are having a big party! I am lucky to have a really supportive husband and I try to be there for my Mum and Dad as much as possible. 

Your advice about taking one day at a time is the best advice you can give. It took me a while to really learn how to do that but it really helps. I do agree that you learn to live with every new step as it comes. 

I hope that your Dad is doing well with his current line of treatments. I am happy to talk with you at any time and please do not hesitate to contact me. At times I feel that talking to someone in the same situation can make you feel less alone. 

I do feel frustrated at times that people quite happily ignore the subject when they are talking to me and then again I get frustrated with myself because everyone has their own life to lead and my problems shouldn't be their own.

Wishing you and your family all the best. Take care, Kate x x 

Hello Kessygirl,

Thank you so much for your reply. This forum has helped no end. I can echo everything that you have said in your post. 

It seems as though your Dad has been fighting this disease for longer than mine. My Dad was diagnosed in November 2011 and to begin with he had several hormonal treatments and now the chemo. He will be 65 in April and we are having a big party! I am lucky to have a really supportive husband and I try to be there for my Mum and Dad as much as possible. 

Your advice about taking one day at a time is the best advice you can give. It took me a while to really learn how to do that but it really helps. I do agree that you learn to live with every new step as it comes. 

I hope that your Dad is doing well with his current line of treatments. I am happy to talk with you at any time and please do not hesitate to contact me. At times I feel that talking to someone in the same situation can make you feel less alone. 

I do feel frustrated at times that people quite happily ignore the subject when they are talking to me and then again I get frustrated with myself because everyone has their own life to lead and my problems shouldn't be their own.

Wishing you and your family all the best. Take care, Kate x x