Hi Jo

Do not work Fridays but helped with our 'Black Friday' set up as it began on Thursday lol.  Of course I will be in on Monday for the 'reversal' of the set up.  High Street certainly buzzing with lots of people but thankfully apart from some liquid gifts I am all sorted apart from writing cards .Working in retail means I don't fancy shopping after 5+ hrs on my feet!!  Do hopefully  have a day trip to Bath Christmas Market in a week's time (for the pure enjoyment of retail therapy!!) with my friend from work.

Dietician (we saw one way back when hubby had chemo) bascically is recommending different protein shakes for hubby to try but may be giving me a call as well.  Following my frustrating blub air is clear indoors and hubby has been trying to eat a little (and more often) when he is awake. I cannot ask for more bless him - we both have things to learn from this journey and feel sure that will be ongoing and I may well have to give myself some serious talkings to along the way but we are in it together which is the most important factor at present.

Thanks for your continued support - it all means a lot especially when those who use this community forum are going through enough themselves.  Have a good weekend and hope Paddy does not run you (your partner) ragged.  Take care, sending hugs  Jules x

Hi Kathy

Glad you  had a lovely time with kids/grandkids and no long before you can go back and be with them over the festive season.  I am sure this will be an emotional time for you all and being together as a family will be good for you all.  I am definitely sure you will never be an imposition (naughty girl for thinking as much) as I know how  much our daughter enjoys extra pair of hands!

If you see my response to Garf (long term mutual forum buddy) you can see what is going on with hubby and his situation.  His district nurses are being great in trying to help (he is turning out to be more stubborn than I could ever have imagined ha ha) and it will be an interesting group get together (palliative and GP team me and hubby) next Tuesday, followed by GP appointment late on Thursday (so I can get home from work in time to go too!) when we will have blood results and see what the next course of action may be.  Hubby slept in till past 11 today and has managed cereal as usual for his brunch.  Can only hope that he will feel able to make the most of the extra nutritional shakes we now have at home.  I feel I have to prompt him (I care too much not to) even though I am not sure if I am doing the right thing as there is not much of a response.  Suppose its natural to feel useless in current situation but not sure how else I should be reacting and just trying to do right thing for him.  Onwards and upwards eh!

Hope you have a relaxing weekend back home (bet pet and garden glad to have you there!) and I am now off to  make my lunch.  Take care and sending hugs. Jules x

Hi Brian

Its lovely that as Wood Club members you benefit from each other's thoughtfulness in swapping (this must be the grown up version of 'school swaps'.  I am sure you will come up with something wonderful to make the most of the different woods.  Your 'night thinking cap' is working overtime.

Do hope Mrs B gets a better night's sleep soon as its really draining after a succession of poor nights.  My 'flushes' have died down a little and my nights, though short (I have  never been one to sleep much more than 5/6 hrs, just like my Mum!) are a little less disturbed.  If I do wake that's when I think too  much!  Enough said.

Have updated hubby's situation in response to Garf so will  not repeat myself other than to say am keeping everything crossed that between his care team/GP/me and family we can keep him well enough to stay out of hospital (managed it so far on his journey through cancer). Its the back sore that has dragged him down understandably but am hopeful that we can talk him round as to accepting help offered.  He managed to get his bloods done at local hospital (drove himself too) even though district nurses will come in if asked.  Can fully understand he is trying to maintain some independence but is so much weaker with the weight loss  hitting hard.

When you posted I was just walking back from the launderette and the rain had stopped and now its brightened up quite a bit.  Garden still far too wet to be doing anything in other than to make sure bird feeders stocked up (their table/feeders probably resemble someone's nut storage area but I have daffodil bulbs shooting!!!!!!!! and its pretty mild today.  As the weather forecast says fine and frosty start tomorrow plan to do the weekly shop early (will be back before hubby surfaces).  I am helping out friends by looking after their 11 yr old for a couple of hours tomorrow evening so they can have pre-Christmas meal with their friends around here (moved out to Bucks last year) and then have a lazy day planned for Sunday.  The in-laws move should begin  on Tuesday so hope the ferry will be running otherwise they will face logistical nightmare with removal vans (both professional and brother in laws) in limbo. As yet we have still not got their new address so hope they keep their phones switched on!

Well have munched my way through lunch and  hubby is dozing having eaten his brunch so better go and do a bit of housework (could do with a gang of elves!).  Take care and hope you Mrs B and your neighbour have a peaceful and troublefree weekend.  Regards  Jules x

Hi Jules,

By now you will hopefully be playing bingo with your daughter who is bound to bring you that bit of extra luck for a win. I will think about you on your busy day on Tuesday especially learning to dress hubbys back and visiting your Mum.  My Mum is a lot better now and she hoped to still go Christmas shopping today but I don't know yet if she was well enough as I have not long got home from work and visiting Pat who I used to work for.

I am in for what should be a fully relaxing day tomorrow as Mrs G is off on a girls trip to London.  I am taking her to the train station for 8am and she won't be back until around 11pm so I will be home alone all day and evening.  I will have to try not to get myself into trouble!:p  She is then supposed to be going to Brighton for the full Christmas shop with the same crowd on Sunday but I have a sneaking suspicion they will be too tired for it so I may still be on "donkey duty" this year after all.>:)

I was very pleased to see that McLaren had finally come to their senses and given Jenson a two year deal to stay with them. He is said to have taken a pay cut to stay and so will now be paid a measly eight million a year. Shame for him eh!;)  He is still my favourite and am thrilled he is staying around for another couple of years.

Not much else to report here so I will sign off and just send hugs and best wishes your way.

Garf. xx

Hi Garf

Hope you enjoyed a peaceful weekend and that Mrs G achieved her shopping plans (no doubt cream-crackered by the time she got home) and enjoyed her girli/Christmas shopping.  Thankfully all  mine sorted and all cards sent/hand delivered.

Have had palliative care worker and district nurses here as planned today.  Options discussed as to a bed/pressure mattress to help relieve coccyx area (still refused by hubby though options remain open and we only need to put in request and it will be here within 48hrs).  I had my 'change the dressing' training so I can do the  necessary over Christmas whilst we are at our sons.  They were pleased to see 'no spread' and hubby has been laying down more than sitting so hopefully this will help.  He has also been suggested to switch to same level of medication but given just twice a day (slow release morphine) as hubby says he is not experiencing any breakthrough pain problems.  The new prescription can be upped as and when necessary or switched to patches if needs be.  I feel I am more in the know too which selfishly helps me!  As to the low eating/drinking they said he can do what he can manage when he can manage it (so my nagging needs to be put on hold!).

He has decided not to go out to the meal planned for this evening mainly because it entailed 'sitting' and too much food though he told me to go - I am staying at home too as it would not feel right being at a semi formal function without him.  We now just have GP routine appointment on Thursday so hopefully that will be it before the festivities(unless they decide then he needs transfusion - cross that bridge if it happens).

Thanks so much for your continued support and hope your Mum continues her improvement.

I have managed to babysit for a couple of hours (daughter and son in law watching eldest son's Christmas play), spent some time with Mum with daughter and Zack for company as well as being back home in time for nurses' visit so am now sitting with feet up and coffee (hubby having glass of milk and handful of chestnuts though today managed two weetabix for breakfast and also enjoyed daughter and Zack visiting for around an hour). 

Well that's enough of a ramble.  Wishing you a peaceful weekend (and yes very pleased Jenson gets to race next year too).  Regards  Jules x

Hi Kathy,

Thanks for your messages and support which are appreciated (though I wish it was not from first hand knowledge).  If you browse the reply to Garf above you will see where we are at (saves me repeating  myself ha ha).

It was somewhat of a relief to know I am doing all the right things (apart from nagging him to eat when he does not really want it) and have been given lots of reassurance that they are at the end on the telephone anytime I need to talk to them.  We are very lucky to have excellent local services which I can reach by bus though hubby still not interested in support of 'club' run by local hospice as prefers his own company. No doubt he will 'get it in the ear again' when he has GP appointment on Thursday afternoon - fingers being kept crossed that this may be the last 'check up' prior to Christmas.

Hope you are keeping well and will be thinking of you as am sure you are having your own emotional struggles whilst being so kind as to respond to 'like folk' on the forum.  As to my eating okay, this is my comfort (could probably do with cutting out naughty snacks though) which will no doubt come back to haunt me when I get on the scales (have avoided cholesterol check up as sure it will have gone up again  - oops).  Chat again soon.  Sending hugs  Jules x

Hi Jo

So nice to hear from you.  How are you doing?

Am counting down the hours to our appointment this afternoon and just feels like we are jumping hurdles towards Christmas at the moment.  Cannot believe I have managed to be organised though keeping busy seems the only way forward. So lucky to have supportive children close by as I know they must be struggling inside whilst bravely carrying on (we all know that feeling here).

Our 'Friday night socials' have continued so far though I am doubtful about  hubby making the walk to the pub this week though he is hoping to at least sit in with his mate over a glass of something whilt I am out with his wife.  Bingo prizes remain much the same (but depends on footfall) though to be honest the winning has become less important as its the getting out that offers the release just now.  Our friends also popped round for a cuppa yesterday afternoon.  As we could not attend the Christmas meal we were hoping to support on Tuesday I had asked them to buy raffle tickets on my behalf (raising funds for local hospice) and they turned up with three prizes for us!  The evening raised over £1200 so although not there in person we heard all about it which was lovely.

This Saturday is my work's Christmas meal so will see if I get to it. Its only for staff anyway but it will depend how things are.  I know hubby will want me to go as he tried to get me to go alone on Tuesday but that just did not feel right and have to go with my 'heart' at the moment.

With Christmas fast approaching work is understandably busy but their support has also been amazing and its helping with my coping mechanism as less time to think!

That new Aldi cheese sounds weird but wonderful and I have treated 'our table' to a basket of shortbread and fudge (both things that are very naughty but can be shared when people drop in). Hubby trying to up the amount of 'shakes' though know he is struggling (far to stubborn to admit it) and continues to refuse 'outside assistance/aids' (understand his need for independence but it would  make it easy for him and his body).

Take care and hope you are enjoying some peace and quiet before the festivities and maybe getting some strolls with partner and puppy (probably growing up fast - dog not other half ).  Sending hugs  Jules x

Hi Jo

By the time I posted this morning I had already been up an hour!!!  My usual get up time is 6 am and I leave for work at 7.30 but somehow my body clock does not differentiate between work and non work days lol.

Visit to GP had mixed results in that his bloods showed better levels than last time in most respects (a surprise even to the doctor!).  However it also flagged raised white cells which usually indicates an infection so she has prescribed antibiotics just in case which I can collect in the morning.  Another plus was that swab of his coccyx sore shows no infection present.  By the time we got home (he insisted on driving himself despite offer of a lift) he was shattered and is now curled up in front of the fire.  Unless things change he goes back in three weeks and must try and eat/drink as and when he can to try and improve energy levels.

Wishing you a peaceful and happy weekend.  Seasonal hugs.  Jules x

Hi everyone,

I hope Jules doesnt mind me using her thread. It's become quite a meeting place over the last few weeks.

Hope, I am so pleased you are are coping better at Christmas now but if your anything like me, you will probably have a sad moment or two just like I do. This is to be expected as Christmas is a time for family  and we cant help but remember those who are no longer with us. So I am sending kind thoughts and best wishes along with a big hug and will think of you.

Jo, I will be thinking of you and your family. You have had a tough year but you have not let things get you down and your humour has always shown through. I truely believe having a good sense of homour helps us through the dark days, I know it did me. Big hugs from me to you.

Garf, I just wanted to send seasons greeting to you and Mrs Garf and I hope you both have a great Christmas. Work seems to have been stressful for you lately so enjoy any time off you have and I hope you are not having to work much over the Festive period.

Kathy, I just wanted to say thank to you for your support during the past few months. I will be thinking of you like I will a lot of my virtual friends on here. I know this time of the year is a happy time but also has moments of sadness as we miss those who are no longer with us. So take care.

Annabel, Hope you have not been too busy of late and if you have are not too tired to enjoy Christmas with your family. Thanks for all your support during the past year. Take care, best wishe to you and your family.

Sueanne, Thank you for the friendship and support you have given to me. I just wanted to say I know like many of us, there will be sad moments of rememberance during Christmas, but I hope you have a happy fun filled time with your family and like many of us, I will be thinking of you.

Jules, it is my wish that next year will be a good year for you and all my friends who meet on your thread. Though many miles may seperate us all, I feel we all have a common bond and I do appreciate chatting to everyone. I would never have done anything like this pre-cancer. I hope you have a great time at your son's over Christmas are are able to re-charge the batteries so to speak as you have had so much to contend with over the past few months.

All. I wish you all a very happy Christmas and hope you all have time filled with love and luaghter. Thank you all for all the support and friendship you have extended to me. I will be thinking of you all, best wishes, Brian and Mrs B. 

Hi Everyone

Sorry to have been slow in responding but due to time of year seem to be lagging behind.  Really appreciative of continued support from all my forum buddies and will take this opportunity to wish everyone a very peaceful and relaxing festive season.  Hubby relaxed though sleeping more.  His stubborness regarding help (from me or anyone for that matter) continues though being so frail through lack of food I am persistant(or just a b nuisance depending on your point of view). He managed the visit to his pal on Friday and included a tot of whisky.  No luck for me at the bingo but a nice social break.  Had the company of daughter and grandchildren whilst out shopping (eureka moment when we found a pair of pyjamas to fit for you know who) and enjoyed a hot chocolate to ward off the chilly morning plus the inevitable burger lunch as pre Christmas treat.  Son in law joined us at home for a couple of hours in the afternoon before they drove around the neighbourhood to view the wonderful array of outside Christmas  lights/decorations - we have quite a few locally that are collecting for charities which is lovely.

I also managed to get to my work Christmas meal for a couple of hours last night and it was very good atmosphere and food.  Spending today quietly indoors as though we were invited to friends for lunch I felt it better that we stayed indoors and let the antibiotics do their best.  Hubby had a good few hours sleep this morning and has just come downstairs so we are cosy in front of a fire.

To you all, thanks for your companionship and support despite all your own ongoing journies and I really do wish you a very happy Christmas. To those we have loved and lost I raise a glass (well a coffee at the moment!) and thank you for the memories that make this time of year so poignant and special.  Hope to be chatting on into 2015 and would also express thanks to the forum moderators who somehow keep us all together despite glitches.

Brian - I am so pleased people like to meet/chat/laugh/cry etc etc and my thread like so many welcomes all imput. Health happiness and peace to you and Mrs B (glad to  hear the nuts are lasting!)

Garf - Hope your family research continues to bring you enormous pleasure and that you and Mrs G enjoy  a happy and healthy year ahead.

Hope - Like your avatar/name suggests trust that the year ahead will continue to see you healing within the warmth of your family/friends - Enormous luck to your boys in their ongoing learning processes - they have a wonderful role model.

Jo - As always sending you good wishes and hope you and your family enjoy the festive season and that the 'grown up' puppy provides plenty of fun too. Look after yourself

Kathy - Am sure you will enjoy whatever time you manage with your son and the little uns.  Hope your house-sitter soon feels well again.  Am thinking of you and sending peace over the miles - no doubt sunny in your garden just now as against damp and mild (not at all seasonal here at the moment!) though the wind makes it feel chilly.Look after yourself

Am off now (I can almost hear your joint sighs of relief ha ha) to fix lunch and to recover from the emotion of watching Strictly Come Dancing on catch up!!!!

Warming hugs to you all, along with anyone who may be reading just know. Jules xx

Hello Jules I love strictly too and voted for Caroline ,Hope you enjoy Christmas with your family I have children and and grandchildren coming on Christmas day so will do all the prep on Christmas Eve so easier on the day have to make the most of it hard as it is but grandchildren always make the day Then at my Sons and family on Boxing day so Rusty comes with me and will have his turkey dinner too bless him .Its 11 degs at the moment and dull with drizzle yuc I braved Asda this morning for a few last minute bits oh god what a bad idea so busy but got it done ..I hope hubby manages a good Christmas dinner and stays well throughout the festivities ..Take care Jules and Merry Christmas to you and hubby and a good 2015 fingers crossed for you and big hug as usual from me and Rusty and Button the cat xxSueanne

Hello Jules I love strictly too and voted for Caroline ,Hope you enjoy Christmas with your family I have children and and grandchildren coming on Christmas day so will do all the prep on Christmas Eve so easier on the day have to make the most of it hard as it is but grandchildren always make the day Then at my Sons and family on Boxing day so Rusty comes with me and will have his turkey dinner too bless him .Its 11 degs at the moment and dull with drizzle yuc I braved Asda this morning for a few last minute bits oh god what a bad idea so busy but got it done ..I hope hubby manages a good Christmas dinner and stays well throughout the festivities ..Take care Jules and Merry Christmas to you and hubby and a good 2015 fingers crossed for you and big hug as usual from me and Rusty and Button the cat xxSueanne

Seasons greetings Sueanne (weather much the same here just now). You will be kept busy entertaining/being entertained (especially with the kiddies) but am sure there will be willing hands too.Surrounded by family is the way to go and whilst we celebrate we also reflect and its mixed emotions. Hugs are sent your way and to your 'trusty Rusty' and companion Button I am sure they will enjoy some festive fare too.  Look after yourself (I am sure my comfort eating will come back to haunt me - you should have seen the size of the slice of chocolate fudge cake they served up for dessert last night but I sent back a clean plate ).

Hubby bless him has just managed scrambled egg for lunch after a lovely morning sleep. Take care.Jules xx