Hi Jules,

The weather is meant to be good again later in the week so looks like you've chosen a good week to have leave.  I'm sure hubby would enjoy the day if he agreed to go along with you and if I were you I wouldn't necessarily take his first "no" as definite.  Perhaps because of his mobility issues, he feels like he would be hindering your enjoyment in some way (which of course he wouldn't).  Is there any way you can persuade him that "you" would enjoy the event so much more if he joined you, even if that meant arranging a shorter trip?  I know he is only eating small amounts but even a little bit of lunch outside (or just a flask of tea) would be lovely as it's meant to be sunny.  If he really cannot be persuaded I am sure he would still want you to go, and I agree with Jo that you should go without feeling guilty.  Fingers crossed though that you conjure up a persuasive method; I hope you have a lovely week off & I'm about to reply to your PM.   Hope x

Thanks everyone for your input.  Have decided to wait and see what hubby says later in the week (he would not manage the journey without assistance as will not do public transport/standing and so far is not interested in going out in a chair though his consultant told him if he wanted to 'enjoy the life he has  been given by taking up the chemo treatment, then he should give it consideration - and he usually listens to her!).  As much as I would love to go I don't want to upset him as it will just make his situation harder.  At the  moment the tv is once again tuned into 'fishing' programmes but I am off to visit my Mum later this morning which will give me a change of scene (but probably not much conversation) and will try and shop for 'something tempting' for our anniversary meal tomorrow.  Hope you all doing okay and thanks again for your continued support.Jules x

Just though I would try and bring a smile to your faces this morning!

Its our wedding anniversary today so I got up and we wished each other happy anniversary and I handed over a card.  We were then having breakfast when hubby says in passing 'I am going to try and get an MOT done on the car today' -  normal service is resumed   Hope you all having a good day.Jules x

Good morning Jules,

I must both apologise and also congratulate you.

First of all the apology. Somehow I seemed to have missed your post asking for opinions about your day out. I can only say that to a degree I have the same problem with Mrs B in that she gets so tired if we go out for a long drive which we both like doing. Like you say I would feel guilty if I go on my own so I guess whatever you decide you cant win. For you feel bad whatever you do. My father in Canada has been on at me to go out to visit him again for the past few years and has kindly offered to pay my flight. But with all Mrs B's health problems I just cant go and leave her for if anything happened, I would never forgive myself. So I know the problem quite well. All I can suggest is you mention how much you would like to go but don't want to go on your own.

Now let me send you congratulations on your wdding anniversary.  We men can be very unromantic at times Jules, we just dont think. I am sire Mrs B would tell you I'm just the same. I hope you have a very pleasant day despite the MOT comment

Take care, best wishes to you and hubby, Brian.

Hi Jules,  Wishing you & hubby a very Happy Anniversary, hope the car passes it's MOT and you can go out somewhere special.   Hopex

Hi Susananne,

Just read your message to Jules and wanted to say that I hope today isn't too painful for you. I cannot imagine the heartache of losing a child and I'm sure the pain never leaves you even though the years pass.  Wishing you strength and peace.  Hope x

Hello Hope thankyou for yourI  message On this forum we have all known loss ,I lost my husband Tony last Feb 2013 and miss him terribly he was my life and such a lovely husband my first loss in my life was my Donna  my beautiful little girl and first born child [you should never have to say goodbye to your child ]but I can say that time does heal once the initial shock of loss has gone ,I still cant mannage to accept the loss of Tony as yet we met as teenagers and there is to much to remember as we were married 40 years and went out for 4 years before that so how can I ever not miss him ..Hope im sorry I have rambled on .I know you lost your lovely mum and dad in such a short time apart and think you are so brave coping as you have thank god for your supportive hubby and children keep smiling Hope and thankyou for your support  ..Susananne x

Thanks Brian for your comments and kind words - no apologies needed.  Am playing the waiting game re the Tall Ships Regatta and see what the day brings.  Have just returned from 'childminding for a couple of hours as our daughter had an appointment which was easier to attend without two children in tow.  Hubby is out getting the MOT sorted and I have a box of his favourite mint chocs (he has had his card) awaiting his return.  Am sure he will be shattered for, as you know, he rarely goes out these days.  It means I have an hour (ish) in charge of the remote so am not watching 'fishing' on tv !!  Its good not having to work for a few days and the garden is beginning to see the benefits of my labours.  At 9 a m this morning I was washing up and looked out and sitting at the end of the lawn was a fox.  Of course as soon as I moved he did a runner (into the garage! which has no side door (since it fell off!!!)) so we are now wondering if he has found his Winter den - time will tell.  Hope you and Mrs B are keeping okay and enjoying the good weather.  Jules x

Hi Susananne

Thank you for your kind words.  It must be a pretty poignant date for you so am sending big virtual hug your way.  I feel like I am now making memories every day (you always are but somehow it feels different now).  Hubby has just returned from getting the car MOT'd(made the appointment this morning!!) and so I did a spot of childminding for our daughter who had an appointment to go to (easier for her not having the kiddies with her to interrupt).  As I have been suffering with 'muffled hearing' she also  gave me a 'hopi candle' treatment and am pleased to say hearing a lot better (and a lot less hassle than being 'syringed'.   Hardly romantic but we may eat out later depending how hubby feels  (have prawns and BBQ ribs on standby if he prefers to stay in).  Lovely weather here the last couple of days so the garden has seen the benefit of some of my handiwork (shears now need sharpening!!)..  Take care of yourself.  Jules x