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Continuing the journey

Hi All

Decided to drop the 'month' from the title of this thread as time moves so quickly and the date becomes irrevelant so quickly.

Hubby and I both feeling pretty drained today but not because of his illness. However it is something that has made both us further stressed and 'outside our control'.  Prepare yourselves for a rant or look away now.

Having put in a long work day yesterday (both of us). I switched on my mobile on leaving work to find a message from the social worker for Mum (regular readers of my thread will know what we have been going through recently).  The upshott of this message was that the Social Services panel have decided that they can offer Mum a place at a sheltered housing complex but not the most local one. The call was to advise me of the panel's decision and to tell me that a visit will be arranged this week, preferably by Wednesday, for Mum to be taken to visit the flat and be told about the package of care and how it will work. They require a decision from Mrs K (this is how my mother is addressed in the follow up e-mail!!) by Friday otherwise the placement will be offered to another service provider!  Unfortunately this means Mum has little choice but to move further away (closest sheltered housing has no vacancy and they are  not willing to help fund where she has spent the last 9 months 'settling in').  The guilt I feel at being unable to cope with this is overwhelming, my hubby is very supportive and angry in equal parts and I am dreading the days ahead.  I am unable to take leave and my negative feelings towards her social worker would not work in Mum's favour as she needs to go on the visit with an open mind and the care home staff state she is quite able to make her own mind up.  If she agrees I will be unable to visit as regularly (my problem not theirs of course) but apparently the social worker will accompany her and I have asked to be kept informed.

Even typing this is making me sad/angry/frustrated and emotionally/physically drained.  I was due to visit Mum today but this is on hold until I have spoken to the care home this morning. Hubby says I should leave it till later in the week when we know what is going on and I suspect he is right (bearing in mind my physical upset involves many 'loo' visits (enough said!!)).

Sorry for all the negativity but just needed to get it out and try and get  myself together before I start on the phone calls.

Hope everyone has a good day.  Regards Julesxx

  • Hey Annabel

    The more the merrier, probably be a beverage stall too (not sure if they are allowed to set up 'wines' on the street).  If the weather is as good as is promised can see it being a slow amble round it rather than a quick look.  Hope you and the family have a good weekend. Jules x

  • [[ ]]Hi All spent 3 good hours in the garden moving stuff around  got hands dirty but it was good for me takes care of the pain went fpr our two walks and did the school run made Beth a Pasta sauce meal she said grandad you are a good cook .Then at 6.30 had a take away from our local curry house so all in all a very good day .Hope you all  had a good day we only have one life and we have to enjoy the good days .

    right that is me for now lets find a picture for Jules xxx

  • Hi Jules,

    Hope you are OK and that you didn't work too hard during World Book Day.  Have you been able to encourage hubby out a little during the nice weather we've had the past couple of days?  I'm plodding on, it's a difficult time as is coming up to my Dad's anniversary, I know it is your Dad's too this month.  I'm trying to cope by focusing on my own family which works some days and not on others.  I see you are still receiving lots of flower photos on your thread, lovely to see flowers in bloom this time of year.  Take care and have a good weekend.  Hope x

  • Morning George

    I was in the garden too the last couple of days (mowed the soggy lawn on Thursday and then yesterday weeded and tidied our front garden). Lovely to be able to get outside and very therapeutic in that you can 'escape' into another place.  Your certainly had your fare share of exercise and hope there are not too  many extra aches and pains today. You are certainly being kept busy. Thanks for the lovely photo again, this is certainly brightening my thread and am sure bringing some extra pleasure to those who maybe reading along.  Hope you have a peaceful and enjoyable weekend. Jules x

  • Morning Hope

    Am not doing too badly thanks.  Have now passed  the anninversary of Dad's birthday which I choose to focus more on than the day he died (probably because its six years now)but things will still be pretty raw for you as its still early days.  I think too that I did not have such a close relationship with my parents which sort of affects how you deal with things

    I did not get caught up in World Book Day itself as have been on leave since Wednesday p.m (go back next Wednesday), using up last of current holiday entitlement.  Apart from shopping trips (new mower and food) hubby (and he told the district nurse this on Thursday) says there is no point going out unless he has a reason and he cant find one so he is happier if I go on my own!!  I always mention what I am planning and give him the option to join me (would be more than happy to go for short stroll) but he has never been much of a walker (unless we were on holiday). Think this just reflects his character and is not just because of his current illness.  It justmakes it clearer to me that this is why he always hated the thought of giving up work and homelife was just something he used to fit it around that.  Still on the bright side I still have him and I never lose sight of that. (he helped me put the mower together too).

    With the better weather I am now able to be outside without having to go too far and have been enjoying getting into the garden the last couple of days (plenty to catch up on and get it tidy so that when the temperature allows I can relax with a book in it without feeling I must be working out there ha ha).

    Hope you have a peaceful weekend and enjoy time with the family.  I am off to try and get myself new work shoes (came home with a hole it mine!!) and also a large roll of birthday paper as have a portapuzzle board to wrap for hubby (birthday not until  April but need to get it hidden!!) this morning and hope by the time I get back the sun will be showing through (or at least temperature up a bit) so I can return to the garden tidying. (very therapeutic).

    Take care and look forward to chatting again soon.  Hugs from Jules xx

  • Good morning Jules,

    You have beaten me in mowing the lawn. I hope to do ours this afternoon as we have a flymo. Then when the lawn dries out will use the other mower as it gives a much better cut. I know what you me about home looking like a chemists as both me and Mrs B have just picked up our prescriptions from the chemist. The nut stall at your french market sounds good but I have my own NUT SHOP in town. I bet they heard about me on here and thats why they decided to open locally. Have just compiled another three slide shows of pictures on Australia, New Zealand and British columbia and played them to our nieghbour this morning. She loved them especially the Koala bear photos.

    Since I had my radiotherapy, I find I have gone of of the strong chedar cheese I used to like. It may be just that my tastes are changing as I get older. Hope this doesnt effect my liking for nuts, what would I do???????

    I do hope you enjoy your few days off and can spend some time reading and relaxing as well as working in the garden. I am hoping to put some of my books onto kindle in April but have to take out all headers and page numbers and have to convert all the text to HTML format which I think I know how to do.

    Take care, hugs Brian.

    attached a pict of one of the tulips my wife bought the other day.                

                              [[ ]]



  • Now come on Brian that is cheating what is in your garden last year or now .The first bloom this year for me is my chamiela if I can find one  you know I am slow and very old .[[ ]]

  • One of my favourite plants George, But haven't tried to grow one here as I don't have a sheltered enough spot where it's out of the early morning sun? . He ho can't have everything in life. Hope your having a good weekend George. I have just managed to hand clip one of the yew hedges. Now putting my feet up .

    Best wishes

    Annabel. xx.

  • Hi Flower I am lucky I have about 7 in the garden and three in pots ready to go, in two of those I took as cuttings just to try my luck and they have taken  .But the fried egg one is the best took this pic an hour ago .

    have a good weekend all ,regards george [[ ]]

  • Well George  you definitely have green fingers and a good eye for a photo.  I tried to put a pic of my own on here but my computer does not want to follow Brian's clear instructions  and suspect its because I cannot 'shrink' it to a manageable size so you have all been spared.  Managed to finish tidying the front garden so at least now I can see what has survived the wet weather (having cut back a ground cover plant that produces large pink daisy like flowers all through the summer (forget its name!!)  I have clearer view of some large purple and while crocus and my fushia bushes (3 alongside low wall) are all showing good signs of life.  Beautiful sunshine here now following a cloudy morning.  Hope you an all other 'readers' are having a peaceful weekend.  Jules xx