Morning Jules,

Was just wondering how you got on when you visited your Mum this week, and also how your daughter got on at hospital?  I do hope things are not too stressful for you and that you can try and have a relaxing weekend.

I'm waiting for my eldest to come home, he has spent somewhat of Freshers sleeping on fellow pupils floors after social events - latest was a toga party last night!  I'm off to my counsellor this morning, had originally been thinking I wouldn't need to see her for too much longer but have been so emotional this week so will talk things over with her.

The weather is forecast to be nice this weekend but is looking a bit gloomy at present.  Here's hoping it brightens up and the sun shines on us all.  Take care  Hope x

Hi Hope

Hope you visit to the counsellor was helpful and its good for you to be able to talk things through and this should last as long as you need it.

I have just returned from visiting Mum and she was ok though I am sure a little concerned at how long she will be able to stay where she.  She has amazed the staff at how forthright she was when social worker 'interviewed' her and they are left in no doubt as to what she wants. All the care staff came to see me whilst I was visiting to make sure I was okay too - very sweet.  I stayed until she was due to go into lunch and we even managed a bit of a laugh when I showed her latest photos of her great grandson.  He has really enjoyed his first week in Reception and keeps telling his mum that his teacher is the most beautiful one in the school!!

Hubby and I picked him up from school on Friday as my daughter had to return to hospital for a second day of tests and monitoring.  Specialist blood tests with regard to her liver function have been sent off and unless she hears otherwise she returns to clinic next Friday.  The last set of bloods were borderline but all readings for the baby were good.  If the new blood tests show certain 'rises' she may have to be taken in and possibly induced (she is now 37 weeks and would probably welcome is being over and done with!!).  Anyway so far so good.  I have an overnight bag ready and waiting and she has several friends on standby to get her to the hospital if her hubby is at work.  Mind you she is still driving herself at present!!

When we met our grandson at school (its only 10mins to his home) he told Grandad that he could meet us there as it was healthier to walk!!!  My hubby's face was a picture as he drove off and I walked the little tyke home!!

Life's stresses seem to come and go but having the forum to offload certainly helped me to see things in perspective this week though I think my mood swings are more due to hormones than current circumstances.

Sounds like your eldest having a great time during Freshers but will no doubt be looking forward to some home cooking.  Have a great weekend with the family and will catch up again soon.  All the best and look after yourself. Jules xx

Morning Jules,

Was so glad to hear of your win on the bingo,!!!! and your bargain hunting sucess in the charity shop.

When I take the local ladies over the Pennines next Tuesday charity shops will be big on the list for 2 of us as there are something like 10 charity shops where we are going.At least 2 of them are cancer research. !!!

Plus lots of nice non charity shops. Personally I love a bargain.

hugs

Annabel. xx

Hi Jules and Annabel,

Thanks for your kind words, I will let you know how the service goes.

Jules, glad that you managed 5 hours sleep but you are still an early riser.  I hope you have a relaxing weekend by that fire, sounds great.

Annable, I hope all is OK with you and again wishing you a relaxing weekend.

Hope xx

Morning Jules,

By now, I bet you've done all your chores and I hope you're relaxing with a well earned cup of tea!

Congratulations on your bingo win and great news about your charity shop find! It's a good feeling to find a bargain and know that you're supporting a charity too! Bet you'll look great too and no doubt you'll receive many compliments. It's  been a while since I've been charity shop shopping. Near where I live, there is a long road with many charity shops on it. I've been known to make it a whole day out on some occasions!

I'm glad you're getting your Christmas shopping sorted. I've been more organised this year and actually bought things as and when I've seen them rather than my usual approach of "I'll get that for so-and-so next time I'm in town"  I only hope I don't see too many things I wish I'd bought instead! I think I said to,you that this year was going to be a 'book' year, so that's still my main aim, but I also love buying little things for my children . . . A hang over from when they were little and I used to buy for their Santa stockings! Now the items need to be a bit more grown up. . . Though they both still love a tube of sweeties in their present! Didn't make it for a walk yesterday . . . An aerial man took priority! But that's another story!

I hope you have a good week and your hubby carries on the good work with his armchair exercises.

Hugs to you and your family xxx

(Hope you don't mind if I tag a few more messages on in this post?)

Hope, I'm thinking of you today and hope the Hospice Memorial service for your mum, goes well and brings you peace. Hugs to you and your men, xxx

Annabel, enjoy your charity shopping on Tuesday. Hope you find lots of bargains . . . Let us know what you find!

I see you've had a whirlwind year with your diagnosis, operations, treatments and running your business! Phew! . . a bit of 'me' time is in order I think! So try and slow your pace down and take care of yourself. (Retail therapy is fine by the way!)    Hugs to you  and your family xxx

Brian, sorry to hear about Mrs. B's recent diabetic problem. I hope she's soon feeling brighter. Sharing your chips eh? What a kind man you are. Chips always taste even more delicious if they're out of someone else's wrapper! Hugs to you and Mrs B xxx

Hi Annabel

Have a lovely shopping day tomorrow.  Have just heard that the tube is suspended this morning on the line I use to get to work so it looks like a longer walk and the bus for me. Lovely start to the working weekl.

Yes, I was very pleased with my bargain dress (I am normally found in trousers  and the formal wear I do have in my wardrobe from previous occasions is too big ) as they nearly always only get worn once or twice.  Also it helps the charity shop (I took clothes in too!!).  Take care Jules x

Good morning Jules,

Hope your walk to work went okay, I wonder will you have the walk and bus when you return home. ???

Like you I am normally in trousers because it's the most practical thing to wear especially at this time of year when its wet and sometimes windy.

I do have a few skirts though and when the long boots come out (which will be soon) I do like to wear a skirt if I am going anywhere.

Mind you putting tights back on isn't a pleasure.

I'll let you know what I find in the charity shops.

And like you I need to take some more in ( if I find time to sort some).

The exhaustion of the last few weeks is gradually wearing off, I've been awake since 6.30 and up since 7.00. Already done 35 mins cleaning in the Barn, just came over for a coffee and chat with friends online.

Hope you have a good day, speak soon

Annabel xx.

Hi Jo

Lovely to hear from you and no problems sharing your the thread with other virtual friends as I am sure like you we all 'read' more than we respond to and its nice to be 'shared' around.

  My  charity shop buying  began by accident many moons ago when the children were toddlers and I noticed some lovely clothes in a window, went in and as they say the rest is history. It saved so much money when they were little and at the same time it was helping a good cause. In our small High Street we have several different charities represented and where I found my latest lucky buy was in the shop run to raise money for our local hospice (where my hubby is now receiving his physio sessions).

I had a relaxing day on Sunday as planned once a bit of housework was dealt with. Quiet too as hubby spent much of the day sleeping.  Some days he does this more than others so just go with the flow.  Yesterday he was better and picked up our eldest grandson from school as our daughter was in the town meeting with a friend and she then kindly dropped by the shop and picked me up from work so I got a lift home. A couple of hours of playing/reading/feeding the grandchildren and then I put my feet up for the evening.  Today I do not work so am going to visit Mum and hubby has 'catch up appointment' with his GP who likes to see him in between his hospital check ups to make sure she stays aware of how he is doing.  He thinks its a waste of time  but I think its a good one and nice to have a GP who 'cares' about his patients.

Cold here this morning and will have to de-frost hubby's car in a bit as don't want him having to stand around too long and get chilled though maybe it will be okay by the time he goes out!!

You are just like me as regards oour adult children's pressies.  Though its mainly money/vouchers (their request) we always do a couple of silly bits to make it 'fun' on the morning when the usual mayhem happens as we all sit round exchanging gifts usually around  mid-morning(the little ones have an early opening so we can all enjoy their excitement first).  All being well there will be 11 of us spending the day together this year (plus resident 2 cats and 2 visiting dogs!!) - still hoping that I do not have to work Boxing Day (I have offered to work Christmas Eve - my usual day off - instead but am waiting to hear back!!

Anyway, need to wake hubby soon so he has time for breakfast before his doc's appointment so had better stop rambling and get on.  Have a peaceful day. chat soon. Jules x

Hi Jules,

Hope you enjoy your walk to your mother home this morning and you are able to have a good chat with her. I do like walking on days like this when it's bright and sunny even if it's a bit chilly like today.

I have had a bad case of Brianitus this morning. One big bag of chestnuts, 2 bags of plain crisps and one packet of cheese biscuits all mysteriously found their way into our trolley. My wife asked how they got in there and I tried to put on my innocent face but probably not very successfully for she knows me too well. 

Glad your daughter picked you up from work and you had some "play time" with your grandson. It's so nice that you have such a good rapport with him as I do think grandparents play a vital role in helping bring up their grandchildren. I know how much I valued my grandparents as I had a stepfather who never spoke to me so I looked on my grandfather as a father figure. He was a real character and some of his sayings used to have me in fits of laughter.

My youngest grandson is taking part in his school play on Wednesday and was apparently quite upset as her told his mum, "But that's Granddad evening and means I will miss seeing him and will not get my stories". She said, he was going to ask the school to change it to another evening, but I have told her I will visit him on Thursday instead and he was quite made up with this. W.H.Smith has done fairly well out of us as my wife has bought all three grandchildren two annuals each. She was only intending to buy one each but she couldn't make up her mind which one to get, hence buying two each. Luckily some were on a special offer.

My granddaughter won another three gold medals at archery on Sunday while my son won a bronze. I am so proud of her as one of the medals she won was in a grown-ups section. She also acheived a personal best.

Sounds like you have a good GP which makes a lot of difference. Ours is also very good. Hope your husbands exercises start to make a difference to his arm/shoulder movement.

Anyway take care and enjoy your time off work and will talk again soon, best wishes being sent your way, Brian.

Hi Jules,

Hope you are OK and that your visit to your Mum went well today as well as hubby's GP appointment.  How are the grandchildren?

The memorial service was emotional and to be honest I've been a bit emotional since.  Still finding it difficult to accept that both my parents have gone.  Meeting up with friends tomorrow on my day off so that will be nice.

Brian - your grandchildren sound adorable!!  Hope all is good with you.

Take care,   Hope xx

Hi Brian

Thanks for your lovely response and update.  Its always great to have my forum buddies pop up in my mailbox.

Like you, really enjoyed being out in the sun (well wrapped up of course) and did enjoy the walk down to see my Mum (and back again!!).  Once again we had a chatty visit if somewhat amusing at times!!  Her duty carer spoke to me when I arrived telling me she had had a sleepless night but was full of beans. She had been laughing and telling them that she would love a day out with everyone to Brighton with fish and chips for lunch (she and Dad used to visit a friend down there and it was what they always did - each paying for their own lunch.)  So I spent over an hour being given instructions on what to buy everyone for Christmas, then to take it in for her to see and then taking it home to wrap (she had been shopping with the carer and gave me the paper,sellotape and instructions on how to label them) and then said we could club together and buy her a pair of velvet trousers so she looked smart on Christmas Day.  I was also told I need a haircut!!  (was already booked for end of the month as have grandson's party then!!). All this after the previous week when she told me she had no interest in the festivities - I am quickly learning to go with an open mind and hope for the best!!!  She has a wonderful memory for birthdays and had bought all the necessary cards to cover the period till the New Year so a waiting for the request for me to write them as she did not want me to do them this time.

I popped into the shops on the way back home for bread and milk and somehow Mr Kiplings packet of individual battenburg cakes fell into my basket - so Brianitus definitely still around - I don't even have the excuse that they were for the other half - he does  not like marzipan so have been a bit naughty the last couple of days finishing them off.

Hubby had visit with his GP and  she has upped his anti-depressants and told him to 'get himself moving whilst he can'.  How is it she can get away with saying things I am thinking but would not have the courage to nag him about!!  They are somewhat concerned that he is not making the most of his life and not sure they understand the devastation he feels now that he cannot do the job that was his life.  I am just thankful that when we have visitors he does make some effort (my daughter is well aware of what its like when she is not here and has been an absolute rock). Tomorrow our son is visiting for a couple of hours so looking forward to that.  Also have a day out in London planned with my friend from work (she has a holiday day booked for my day off next Tuesday) and are having gossip and lunch out (she says I need a stress free break bless her - I am obviously easy to read and she has some understanding as her husband had a couple of years battling cancer -  ok thankfully - and relates to the 'silent treatment' I am having when indoors.

Hope your grandson enjoys your rearranged visit and am sure he will love telling you all about the school activities too.  I never had grandfather's when I was a child (both died before I was born) but do love to watch the interaction when the new baby and our grandson visit - those smiles are worth their weight in gold.

Well sorry for long rambling reply and do hope you and Mrs B are keeping warm indoors and enjoying those 'naughty snacks'.  Take care and sending peaceful thoughts and virtual hugs.  Jules

Hi  Hope

Glad you have the support of your 'men' and cannot begin to imagine how emotional the memorial service must have been for you.  Its a lovely way to celebrate your parents' lives but emotionally draining coming far too soon after your father's passing/memorial service.  You cannot rush emotional feelings nor can we necessarily control them as we would like.  They are our bodies way of giving us a release valve. Sometimes feel like I would just like to be alone in a room to scream it all out when the emotions get too much and I am not dealing with anything nearly as hard as you.  Just so glad we have this forum to escape into as sometimes just writing it down (though I feel like I am having real-time conversations) reminds me that there is a real reason why we feel so drained.  Keep sharing Hope and we can keep you company.  Take care my virtual friend.

By the way the grandchildren (and my daughter) doing pretty well.  Eldest is doing well with his early home reading books and loves to  learn the  new words (we did his 'tricky' words with him on Monday as he came to tea) and also enjoying colouring a lot more though nothing will ever replace 'cars' as his main love - he never gets tired of racing them round the room.  We also played Connect 4 and tiddlywinks before they all went home to have their bedtime story with Mum and Dad.  Bbay is feeding well and though still has reflux the Health Visitor has recommended a different milk which my daughter is going to try as apparently this could mean he wont need to take the baby Gaviscon.  All  being well she is off to clinic next week to have him weighed.  My daughter is virtually back to feeling herself just needing to get a bit more energy for the longer walks she likes to do when they go to the park or woods with the children but  all in all she has picked up well.

Hubby has been given a new prescription for anti depressants and his GP has told him to get himself more  mobile whilst he has the ability to do so as sitting down all day is not the way to be!! (I would  not get away with saying it but certainly agree with her as he is able to do most things still but his ;mojo' went when his job finished.). Thankfully he puts on a different face when we have visitors.

Take care of yourself and let the family spoil you too. Sending virtual hugs for a peaceful week.  Jules x

Hi  Hope

Glad you have the support of your 'men' and cannot begin to imagine how emotional the memorial service must have been for you.  Its a lovely way to celebrate your parents' lives but emotionally draining coming far too soon after your father's passing/memorial service.  You cannot rush emotional feelings nor can we necessarily control them as we would like.  They are our bodies way of giving us a release valve. Sometimes feel like I would just like to be alone in a room to scream it all out when the emotions get too much and I am not dealing with anything nearly as hard as you.  Just so glad we have this forum to escape into as sometimes just writing it down (though I feel like I am having real-time conversations) reminds me that there is a real reason why we feel so drained.  Keep sharing Hope and we can keep you company.  Take care my virtual friend.

By the way the grandchildren (and my daughter) doing pretty well.  Eldest is doing well with his early home reading books and loves to  learn the  new words (we did his 'tricky' words with him on Monday as he came to tea) and also enjoying colouring a lot more though nothing will ever replace 'cars' as his main love - he never gets tired of racing them round the room.  We also played Connect 4 and tiddlywinks before they all went home to have their bedtime story with Mum and Dad.  Bbay is feeding well and though still has reflux the Health Visitor has recommended a different milk which my daughter is going to try as apparently this could mean he wont need to take the baby Gaviscon.  All  being well she is off to clinic next week to have him weighed.  My daughter is virtually back to feeling herself just needing to get a bit more energy for the longer walks she likes to do when they go to the park or woods with the children but  all in all she has picked up well.

Hubby has been given a new prescription for anti depressants and his GP has told him to get himself more  mobile whilst he has the ability to do so as sitting down all day is not the way to be!! (I would  not get away with saying it but certainly agree with her as he is able to do most things still but his ;mojo' went when his job finished.). Thankfully he puts on a different face when we have visitors.

Take care of yourself and let the family spoil you too. Sending virtual hugs for a peaceful week.  Jules x

Hi Jules,

Thanks for your lovely, kind words.  Thank goodness for this site!  I know nobody can take away the pain but it is just good to have support.  I have to remind myself that it is still early days, only 3 months tomorrow since Mum died, and I miss them so much especially this time of year. Now I am just trying to enjoy my own wonderful family and be happy for what we have.

Lovely to hear how well your grandsons are doing.  It is great that you read and play with your eldest so much, that will really help with his development at school.  Only too often we see secondary children struggling to read who have not been reading enough through primary.  I hope hubby's new prescription will see him improve his mood, very difficult for him and you.   I guess they will take a couple of weeks to work, but hopefully they will kick in and help to make him more upbeat by Christmas.  I'm sure the "little ones" will be the best drug, they can surely lift spirits better than any pill.  Take care and have a good weekend.  Hope xx