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Husband diagnosed with stage 1b superficial melanoma. Waiting to find out what happens next

JayneJF
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Hi, a bit of background! my husband just got diagnosed with stage 1b superficial melanoma no ulceration size 10mm x 15mm, biopsy removed it but waiting for WLE and SLN date, hospital shows waiting list of 18 weeks average so would be towards end of November. 
no lymph nodes were palpable 4 weeks ago but at the weekend we found a lump above the collarbones we have contacted out MacMillan cancer nurse 4 times but no response so went to GP yesterday who said she thinks the lump is too big for a swollen lymph node but will put on 2 week wait list for Ultra sound, ordered blood tests and a chest x ray. These have both been done already. 
Anyway, we have the holiday of a lifetime booked in 3 weeks time to Disney world with our children and grand daughter, my husband is adamant we are going regardless of the node outcome etc. I don’t know what to think, will 2 weeks make a difference to the whole outcome? He is saying he wants to do the holiday before he goes down the path he may need too and it will give him time to prepare for as well as a distraction for a few weeks, is this a good idea? Sorry this is really long. 

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    Hi JayneJF,

    I'm sorry you are both going through this worry. You don't say where on the body your husband's melanoma was. This may give you a better idea if the lump near the collarbone could be related. Melanoma on the lower limbs tends to travel to the nodes in the groin. Melanoma on the torso tends to travel to the nodes in either the groin or the armpit (axillary nodes). Melanoma on the neck or head tends to travel to the nodes in the neck or chest area. Is the lump hard, immovable and painless? In which case it could be a swollen lymph node due to melanoma but they rarely swell larger than a golf ball - also factor in that nodes can swell due to infection - has your husband had a cold or felt ill in any way recently?

    With regards to your question about your holiday - from personal experience I've found that a delay of 2 weeks will not make any difference to the outcome. I found the lump in my groin and wasn't seen for 2 weeks. Because I was already a melanoma patient, I was given a fine needle aspiration biopsy the next day & it was confirmed that my 1b melanoma had spread to my groin node (13 years after I'd originally been diagnosed). In those days the only treatment was node removal (these days they also have drug treatment) and they couldn't schedule me in for the surgery for 3 weeks so I went on my 3 week holiday. I'm glad I went on holiday because I couldn't bear sitting in my 4 walls waiting for the surgery - the holiday was a great distraction. 

    If you still want to speak to someone professional, either ring the consultant's secretary, explain the situation & that you need to speak to the nurse OR take a look at the Melanoma Focus website - they have a dedicated Nurse's helpline & they may be able to reassure you regarding your holiday dilemma  Melanoma Helpline - Melanoma Focus

    Meanwhile, I will send you a friend request. If you accept it I can send you a private message with some further information that you may find helpful. Good luck & please let us know how you get on,

    Angie (Stage 3 melanoma patient since 2009)

  • Offline in reply to AngieT

    Hi Angie, thank you so much for responding. It’s on his lower arm. They told us to look for signs in his armpit but nothing there, it’s currently around 5cm in size and firm no pain. O my found it as it was our first full body check since diagnosis. He won’t it me check daily it causes too much anxiety. The McMillan nurse just returned our call and we are going in this afternoon for her to look at the node, hoping she will tell me it’s a cyst or something less sinister but I feel sick, I can’t imagine how he must feel right now.
    Thank you for the advice on the holiday, I’ve been saying we should cancel incase a time becomes available for the WLE and SLN but he’s saying it’s been inside him for over a year so 2 more weeks aren’t going to matter and the benefit he will get from a holiday with his grand daughter is what he wants. I do understand that but I just want my husband. Healthy. I will of course support what he wants as his mental state matters so much going in to this fight. I’m pleased to hear you had the same situation and went on the holiday and it helped, that’s what I hope it will be for him. A distraction as the last 2 months have been nothing but hospital visits, phone calls, anxiety and stress.

    i will accept your friend request as any help guidance info you have is so appreciated. I can’t thank you enough for this message as it’s made me feel so much better about us taking the break for his mental wellbeing. Thank you Angie x  

  • Offline in reply to JayneJF

    So glad he has an appointment this afternoon. I've sent you a private message. Good luck xx

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