Thanks Eddie - I’m absolutely dreading the date of the oncologist meeting - even that word scares me! I will make sure to ask for a copy of his notes & scans. 
I can look beyond it when you talk about your 7th holiday, exercising 3 times a week etc!! At the moment my husband’s sense of humour & optimism have disappeared - we’ve been married for nearly 44 years & never stopped laughing so I’m looking forward to seeing him smile & laugh again & will do my best to help him through all of this. 
Speaking & sharing invaluable.

Linda xx

I think it's the fear of the unknown I've proved to myself how strong I can be shed tears up the sand hill with my dog as my daughters husband was going through cancer of the throat at the same time as my husband liver cancer one in Blackburn and one in blackpool.a great 5yrs but they pulled themselves through it together but it's  very hard at the moment life span for liver cancer 5yrs 20th November when he had his op but we stay positive and take each day as it comes been away 4 times in 3mths and getting itchy feet again for scotland you stay strong love x

Morning Linda, I see your posting at 3am, poor sleep is normal, as is feeling awful meeting your oncologist, just be prepared, ask them every question you can think off, if you haven't got your cancer nurse specialist CNS yet, she may be at your  meeting, as she will be one of your MDT, she will be your connection to them and your oncologists, so get her contact details, If there is time before your meeting, could you get away or visit friends, even going for a nice long walk helps, married 44 years, that's wonderful, congratulations, Sheila, my partner and I have only been together 17 years, but we are getting married next summer, it was meant to be next Wednesday, but my eldest daughter, not Sheila's, "biologically" isn't well. We all find the strength to get through this, many couples love and relationship deepens, as I have been both carer and "cared" for, I like many others would say, being the carer is harder than being the bared for so please don't forget to look after yourself, It's so important you do. 

love Eddie xx

Hi Eddie - that’s a shame you’ve had to delay your wedding but it will happen next year & you have it to look forward to. Hope your daughter gets well soon. 
I’ve learned a lot from your posts - not least to make sure we ask questions & speak up & ask for help in need. We’ll give all of this our best shot. We’ve got our CNS - she’s nice - very approachable & I think may be helpful going forward. 

I’ve always been an insomniac & at the moment I’m just getting through as best I can. Sleep & anxiety meditation does help a bit. Posts in the middle of the night & reading are ‘par for the course’ for me. Thanks again - love Linda x

Morning Linda, and thank you for your kind words, my daughter and I boht have our MDT meetings next Monday, so a little stressful here, hence the 10 days at the Scilly Isles, the weddings all sorted, just a change of dates, we could have had it sooner but Sheila has SAD really bad and migrates to Australia for 4 months from November.

It's good to hear you already have your CNS, mine is at urology but she's on my MDT, and arranged for me to have an open door arrangement with her and urology, so i can pop in anytime without an appointment. sorry to hear about your insomnia, i had it for 18 months, I did relaxation therapy which has helped enormously, If your interested, you can attend or do it online at www.maggies.org PS if you have a local Maggie's, there well worth a visit, patients, partners and family all welcome open 9am to 5pm, no appointment needed, take care.

Eddie xx

Hi Eddie - thank you for your reply and as always reassuring words. Hope you and your daughter’s MDT meetings go ok tomorrow - goodness you do have a lot going on. 
We’re still waiting for a date for an appointment with the oncologist - we’ve both done lots of reading and have plenty of questions ready to ask. 
I think the elapse of time has helped us both process things a bit better and especially for me linking up on this chat line has made me feel less alone. I’ve taken a look at where my local Maggies is and my son has already reached out to them with questions which he’s found helpful.

Anyway - I’ll be thinking of you and your daughter on Monday and hope there’s some good and positive news for you both. 

Love Linda x

Thank you for your kind and positive words. If I can find a fraction of the strength you have I’ll count myself as very brave. You have so much to contend with. 

Hope you get to Scotland soon - I love Scotland very much! 

Love Linda x

Morning Linda, and thank you for your kind words regarding Mandys and my MDT meetings, it's almost certain it will be surgery later in the week for Mandy, i I have some idea where my treatment is going, I have 2 scan results tomorrow  too which may influence my treatment.

Good to hear your researching, on reputable sites I trust, the more you know, the better you can prepare. Regarding your questions, if you do a copy to give to your oncologist, they can answer them in an order which is easier to follow and understand, but always record meetingsand ask for a full copy of the meeting and any scan results.

I'm glad you are both feeling a little better, it's so tough in the beginning for everyone, and knowing your not alone and can talk to others on a similar journey, and realising your emotions are the same as everyone's is comforting 

Good your in contact with Maggies, they are wonderful and offer so much support, my Maggies are both about 70 minutes away, but well worth the drive.

Thank you again Linda, for tomorrow, it's appreciated, and best wishes to you both.

love Eddie xx 

Hi Dunes2019, I am so sorry I missed your post, memory issues, though I'm not sure it was intended for me, We are three years on from diagnosis and despite all my health issues we're doing ok, and that strength you mentioned that we find for each other and how this awful disease brings you closer together is a big reason why. my partner, Sheila, likes to say, we have cancer, cancer doesn't have us. Though we do have down days and I can start crying at any time, which I don't mind, I too have had a prognosis, 3 actually, so choose to ignore it, to me having some ones guesstimate of your possible time left hanging over you, cannot be good for you. I read you both love Scotland, so do I, though I live in Yorkshire, I was born in Oban, and we go to Scotland to see family and friends whenever we can, living life while we are able, seems to us to be ay to live

Eddie xx