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New baby and family terminal ill

SH24
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Any advice on how to cope with a new baby when your parent is terminally ill. It’s a new diagnosis and we don’t have long. I feel extremely conflicted with my priorities and don’t know what to do. I constantly keep crying, I m struggle to eat and getting very little sleep. I am looking after my baby who is doing very well but I feel incredibly guilty for being so sad.

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    I'm so sorry to hear of your parents diagnosis.  From my point of view, I would actually say you have to try and look after yourself first - eating and sleeping (what's that with a new born?!) so that you are able to help your baby and your parent. it's okay to feel sad too. For me I would want the baby to see its grandparent as much as possible, and in my family at least, I know that would help the grandparent too. Just be mindful if they need a rest.

    There is no right or wrong answer though IMO. It must be an incredibly difficult time and you need to go easy on yourself and you are allowed to have emotions - feeling sad or even happy at times!

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    Hi SH24

    So sorry to read your message and the turmoil that you are going through.  I went through a similar situation 27 years ago.  My brother was diagnosed with terminal cancer on the day that I gave birth to our first baby, my mum and dad's first grandchild.  I was told 10 days later so had to cope with a new baby and this devastating news.  Unfortunately he only lived for a further six weeks.

    Please try and look after yourself as your new baby is dependent on you.  Don't feel guilty for feeling sad.  I can remember hugging my baby and crying uncontrollably about my brother.  I spent as much time as I could with my brother but he found it too hard to see his new niece. Thankfully I had  help so take up any offers from friends and family and rest when you can.  It's a very stressful situation but you will find strength and get through it and your baby will bring joy and love to you and your family when you need it most.

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