Hello Cabbs, 

I am so sorry to hear that your mum's breast cancer has spread to her pelvis and bones - it's so sad that this is happening when you only lost your dad in August and have not even had a chance to grieve properly. How heartbreaking for you to see her so frail and that she seems to be giving up and not putting up a fight anymore. I hope that the district nurse will have some helpful advice for you next week and that support will be put in place very soon as it sounds like it may be needed especially as you are doing most of the caring for your mum and I can imagine you are feeling exhausted at times and that emotionally it can be really hard. I am sure your mum is very grateful and appreciative of everything you are doing for her. Our website has helpful information for family, friends and caregivers which contains helpful tips on how to support someone with cancer but also on how to look after yourself which is also very important and can be easily forgotten. 

Sometimes it's really hard to talk to others about this - as you say, others may not know what to say or they may struggle to find the right words. This is why this forum is a great place for you to connect with others who know exactly what you are going through at the moment and who have found themselves in a similar position before. I hope that they will be along shortly to say hello and share their story with you. You are definitely not alone and we are thinking of you and your mum during this difficult time. 

Best wishes, 

Lucie, Cancer Chat Moderator

Hello Cabbs, 

I am so sorry to hear that your mum's breast cancer has spread to her pelvis and bones - it's so sad that this is happening when you only lost your dad in August and have not even had a chance to grieve properly. How heartbreaking for you to see her so frail and that she seems to be giving up and not putting up a fight anymore. I hope that the district nurse will have some helpful advice for you next week and that support will be put in place very soon as it sounds like it may be needed especially as you are doing most of the caring for your mum and I can imagine you are feeling exhausted at times and that emotionally it can be really hard. I am sure your mum is very grateful and appreciative of everything you are doing for her. Our website has helpful information for family, friends and caregivers which contains helpful tips on how to support someone with cancer but also on how to look after yourself which is also very important and can be easily forgotten. 

Sometimes it's really hard to talk to others about this - as you say, others may not know what to say or they may struggle to find the right words. This is why this forum is a great place for you to connect with others who know exactly what you are going through at the moment and who have found themselves in a similar position before. I hope that they will be along shortly to say hello and share their story with you. You are definitely not alone and we are thinking of you and your mum during this difficult time. 

Best wishes, 

Lucie, Cancer Chat Moderator