Hello Starshine4

I'm so very sorry to hear about the news that you have been given regarding your Mum's health. It's understandably an incredibly difficult time for you both and natural that you will have lots of questions and concerns about the coming weeks and months. 

Hearing that a loved one has an incurable cancer diagnosis can be devastating and I know that this past week will have been a real rollercoaster for you both. Has your Mum been referred to a local hospice or palliative care team? Hopefully, this has already been done and you have had some contact with them. They are a great source of help and support so don't be afraid to lean on them. If you've not yet been referred or haven't heard from anyone then do get in touch with your Mum's GP practice to request that this help is arranged for you both. 

I know that many of our members will agree that it helps to talk with someone at times like this. If you want to chat with one of our team of nurses you're most welcome to call them on 0808 800 4040, Monday to Friday 9am to 5pm. I know they will be happy to listen and offer any advice, information, and support they can. 

Keep in touch here on the forum if it helps to have somewhere to put down in writing how you're feeling. You're welcome to ask questions or offload here. We'll do our best to offer some support through this difficult time. 

Sending you both my best wishes, 
Jenn
Cancer Chat moderator 

She went into hospital yesterday as she was feeling so poorly!! I’m assuming she will stay there, but not 100% sure as it’s all happening so quickly!!

Hello Starshine4

I'm sorry to hear that your Mum has been feeling so very unwell. I hope that the hospital team are able to make her feel more comfortable and that the two of you are able to spend some time together. 

Keep in touch and let us know how things go. 

Sending you both my best wishes, 
Jenn
Cancer Chat moderator 

I hope so too. I thought she might be a bit better today but she was the same as yesterday. She now has a palliative nurse and I think they are starting a new regime tomorrow with morphine, so we will see what happens!! I am visiting but she is increasingly sleepy.

thank you 

Is anyone online? My mum has cancer. Within a month from fully operation happy mum she is on palliative care. She’s very weak and since yesterday she has hallucinations, seeing things and hearing things. I struggle a lot. All happen so quick and is devastating 

I have no idea how this will progress, she was diagnose with lung cancer and it’s progressing very fast. It’s heart braking. She’s on extended course of steroids and doctor said this could happen th hallucinations and all due to meds. I’m just scared Omar’s I do not want her suffering like that and it’s heart braking. Last night she message me at 2 am asking for help so I went to hospital and s calmed down. I am in peace’s and don’t know what to do or how to help

She’s only 58 and this happen so quickly, my heart is broken and I have no idea how I will manage this and I do not want her suffer as she went through a lot and we were very close it’s devastating 

This literally sounds exactly the same as what has happened to me.

All the nurses are asking if she had a frame to walk/caters etc and I’m telling them you NO…you wouldn’t believe this time last month she was marching around, staying in hotels, shopping, eating out, driving, gardening, etc she hasn’t been feeling well for the fee weeks and the last two weeks she’s slept more and more, eating less and less, getting weaker and weaker and now in hospital. Her speech is so slow and she still doesn’t seem comfortable in the hospital…which I was hoping she would. It’s such an awful time. I worry about her, am sad for her and me and I also need to get used to living on my own. Everything has changed over night.

I hope you have friends and family around to help and support you and that someone else reply’s to your message who has gone through the same as us and can advise us how to get through this.

thainking of you x

This literally sounds exactly the same as what has happened to me.

All the nurses are asking if she had a frame to walk/caters etc and I’m telling them you NO…you wouldn’t believe this time last month she was marching around, staying in hotels, shopping, eating out, driving, gardening, etc she hasn’t been feeling well for the fee weeks and the last two weeks she’s slept more and more, eating less and less, getting weaker and weaker and now in hospital. Her speech is so slow and she still doesn’t seem comfortable in the hospital…which I was hoping she would. It’s such an awful time. I worry about her, am sad for her and me and I also need to get used to living on my own. Everything has changed over night.

I hope you have friends and family around to help and support you and that someone else reply’s to your message who has gone through the same as us and can advise us how to get through this.

thainking of you x

Yes it’s very difficult seeing mum in that state. As long as she’s not in pain and conscious then I am in peace. Since last night mum start hallucinating ( I hope due to meds not cancer spread in brain) but she want to go home Tuesday so hope her last wish will be done as her oxygen has improve. She’s on morphine pump that delivers medication 24/7 as that help her a lot with pain and under palliative care your mum can request PRN for anxiety and panic attacks which will help a lot especially with sleeping at night so worth to mention to the nurses… I’ve just got myself half Xanax for anxiety as today it affected me very badly and I hope I’ll sleep if mum won’t call and sleep through night. The worse part is right now her hallucinations… I’ve talk to her in video and she was showing me corner of her room telling me someone is looking at her and stuff like that is really terrifying so I’ve calm hospital and ask nurse to check on mum and they give her lorazepam for anxiety and she went to sleep so I’m hoping she’ll be fine till morning but it really hurts… no words to describe and we have been very close whole life and went through so much together and now life turns out like that. 

It is so scary that the drugs that can often help often have horrible side affects!!

I hope both you and your mum gets a good nights rest!!

Yea my mum and I did everything together and had such lovely times, which I am very grateful for!!

Yes but without morphine there would be to much pain and anxiety would be through the roof… thank you for your time stranger… it help a little talking to someone who is going through the same and can related. Wish you all the best. You will make it through regardless of what yet to come. Take care and thank You

Thank you too, it does help a little you are right

take care and good luck with everything