hi there 

sorry to hear of your sons position. 

From what i know, of palliative care - it dosent always mean end of life care - i know when we hear this word we assume it does.  The worst thing you can do just now is jump to conclusions.  I know its easy said than done.  I ve been through cancer with mum and also dad.  

You can recieve this care along side other types of care.    In a way its care to help the patient feel better without curing the problem.  So thats why you can have palliative care along side the other types of care that can help cure the issue. 

best advice i can give you 

praying for you all 

Hi David, thanks so much for your response, the doctor I spoke to didn't know anything about his cancer, she is only concerned with the tube for food, fluids and drugs. It's very confusing, I read it's not end of life care, but in the next sentence it's care for someone with a terminal illness, which to me is a step further back, but on the same road.

He is 42, not a child, but I am going to try to speak to his Macmillan nurse.

Thanks again for taking the time to reply, I don't know the outcome for your mum and dad, but hoping you had some support whichever way it was resolved.

i think that bit IS confusing due to the fact that it is used and heard alot in end of life patients.  Just because it is used there dosent mean it is.  It basically just means its the part of his care that is not dealing with the illness.  purley making him feel better and confortable and nothing to do with curing.  It is very confusing esp when your under so much stress.   

my mum passed 9 years ago .  aggressive lung cancer.  Dad had gastric cancer . was taken out two weeks ago along with his stomach -  eating is a issue for him just now but something that can be worked on. 

I wish all the best.  Were always here for you .

Hi palative care is similar to uncurable,you can have treatment but cannot be cured.i was diagnosed Feb 2016 told uncurable,two years later under a different oncologist told palative care, I've got prostate cancer gone to lymph nodes spine ribs pelvis and a lung .     Nothing really changed just new meds,(I'm on them for life) it can vary alot depending what is wrong and treatment options of course.   Hope eating improves for him and things improve.

Take care keep positive.

Billy

Hello there and thanks for posting

I am sorry to hear about the treatment your son has had and the difficulties he currently has.

It must be difficult seeing him like this but hopefully the team involved in his care will find a solution soon so your son can get all the nutrition, fluids and medications he needs.

Palliative care is where specialist treatment, care and support can be given to patients often with a life limiting illness but not just at the end of life. The palliative care team are experts in symptom control and are there to manage difficult or new symptoms and keep patients as comfortable as possible and give a good quality of life.

Do talk to the team involved in your sons care to talk these things through with them. They are in the best position to explain what needs to happen next and what to expect in the future.

I hope this is helpful but do get back if you need to. You are also very welcome to call our nurses helpline on 0808 800 4040 if you rather talk things through over the phone. We're here mon-Fri 9-5.

Best wishes to you and your son

Naomi

So sorry to hear about your mum, and I wish you and your dad all the best. This all so scary, he has a 14 year old daughter plus 3 older children, they lost their mum 5 years ago, I can't bear to imagine a bad outcome.

trying to stay positive, thank you for your good wishes.

Hi Naomi, thank you so much for your reply. I feel reassured, but what do you mean when you say life limiting. My son actually asked the palliative care nurse today did it mean his cancer can't be cured, but she said no, you're on the cure list. I'm probably overthinking this, but that is part of my personality.

I'm sorry to be a pain over this.

Hi Billy, thanks for your reply. I'm so sorry to hear your cancer can't be cured, and I wish you the very best life you can get. I feel a little reassured that palliative care doesn't necessarily mean end of life care. It's just so confusing.

Take care.

Hello and thanks for getting back to us.

Without being involved directly in a patients care it is difficult for us to comment too much into any given situation and the team looking after your son are the best people to talk to about his situation.

It is good news they are giving treatment with the intention of cure. Palliative treatment is designed to relieve symptoms, and improve your quality of life. It can be used at any stage of an illness if there are troubling symptoms, such as pain or sickness. As I say, the palliative care team are experts in symptom control which is why they can be called in sometimes for advice and to try and get on top of difficult symptoms, so this may be the reason why it has been mentioned to your son. You might want to read more on our website

Please get back again with any further questions.

Take care

Naomi