I’m 16 myself, so I know I’m not exactly qualified to give advice, but from my own experience with anxiety and depression, I can say that the number one thing that helps me feel better is the presence of other people. Having someone there, even if they don’t say anything, makes such a difference when you’re feeling low.

I think depression, PTSD, or bipolar disorder can make people feel incredibly isolated, and when you’re grieving, that sense of loneliness can be even worse. But just knowing you’ve got people around who care about you and want to be there can bring a sense of warmth and comfort.

If you want to support your partner, the most important thing is to show them you’re there for them. It might be helpful to tell them outright, but actions tend to speak louder than words. Be present with them — listen when they need to talk, and do small acts of kindness that will show you care, like cooking for them or just giving them a hug. Sometimes, these little things make all the difference. It’s also important to respect their space if they’re not ready to talk — overwhelming someone with too much attention can sometimes make them feel like a burden, or it can be too much to handle, which might only add to their discomfort.

Everyone’s different, so it’s also useful to tailor your support to what your partner enjoys or feels comfortable with. That way, it’ll feel personal and sincere.

Of course, I’m just speaking from personal experience, and I don’t know your partner or their situation well enough to give specific advice. It might be worth considering whether they’d feel comfortable talking to a therapist or counsellor if they’re not already. If they are seeing someone, that person could offer more professional guidance on how to best support them. If not, it could be worth suggesting they reach out for help. Sometimes just opening up the conversation about getting support can be a helpful first step.

I hope this is at least a little helpful! :)

Hello and thanks for your post,

I am sorry to hear about your mum's partner I can understand that this must be a difficult time for you all and you in particular trying to protect your partner.

I am not sure what support your partner's mum will receive when she is at home but she may well be given a palliative care nurse. The palliative care nurses are there to support the patient and their family and if you have an opportunity to explain your concerns to the nurse that would be helpful.

You could get in touch with your partners GP with your partners permission. If you don't feel that you can ask her then you could still talk to the GP but they would not be able to share any health information but at least they would be made aware of your concerns.

There is a UK charity called BipolarUK and you could contact their helpline for advice. They may well have information about supporting a patient caring for a very ill relative and what support they may need when her mum dies..

The charity Mind has different links to charities that might help your partner.

We have some more links on our website and information on support when someone is dying

It is good that you are preparing yourself and your partner for what may happen in the future.

I do hope that some of these links may help.

You and your partner and her mum are all very welcome to ring and speak to one of the helpline nurses.

The nurses are her Monday to Friday 9 am to 5 pm and the Freephone number is 0808 800 4040.

All the best,

Catherine