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How to get a different oncologist

Cryptchick
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I had a horrendous first meeting with my oncologist, she was cold, lacking empathy and expressionless through the entire appointment. I had gone in thinking it was straightforward as I'd already decided to have chemotherapy. I left upset and not wanting any treatment at all.

I contacted my BC nurse about the appointment and asked her if I could have a different Dr. She said she'd look into it. But I'm no further along with that.

I honestly cannot have any contact with that Dr again, my mental health isn't good at the best of times and now it's hanging on by a thread. Having to see that Doctor when I'm at my most vulnerable, I'm not sure how I would cope.

Do you have any info on how I could request a different oncologist?

My chemotherapy is going to be in a different hospital and my BC nurse said I'd only have to see the Dr for updates in the clinic but even that I honestly could not cope with.

If i was in any doubt that I may have got it wrong 25mins into the appointment my sister had to be called in, and she felt the exact  same about the Oncologists manner.

Thank you x

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    Hi Cryptchick,

    I am very sorry to hear about your appointment with the oncologist. I had a similar experience with my oncologist 14 years ago. I informed my oncologist that I never wanted to see her again and I never did. I eventually changed hospital and found a much better care team altogether. This made such a difference, as you really have to trust in your care team. Is there another oncologist at your hospital, if so it should be easy enough to transfer. I sincerely hope that you manage to find someone else. I would speak to your consultant or breast care nurse first, but if you have any bother you can always contact PALS for help.

    Please keep in touch and let us know how you get on We are always here for you.

    Kind regards,

    Jolamine xx

  • Hello, and thanks for your post,

    I am really sorry to here about your situation. Most trusts do have two breast oncologists but a lot will depend on how big the hospital is and any staff shortages. 

    I would check back in with your breast care nurse (BCN) and see what they have arranged and if this is not forthcoming you could always talk to PALS to see if they can look into this for you. 

    If you are having your chemotherapy at a different hospital is it possible for you to see a different oncologist at this hospital. 

    I can understand that this is not something you want to think about just before you start chemotherapy but hopefully the BCN may be able to help you here.

    I am not sure from your post where you are living in the UK but if you are near a Maggie Centre you may find it helpful to access some of their services online and in person.

    It is so important that you get some support for yourself. Breast Cancer Now have a service called Someone Like Me where they can try and put you in touch with others in a similar situation. 

    You have posted in 'ask the nurses' but if you post on another thread you may find you get responses from other women in a similar situation.

    I do hope that you feel supported over the next few weeks.

    You are welcome to ring and chat through any of this with one of the nurses on the helpline.

    Our number is Freephone 0808 800 4040. We are here Monday to Friday 9 am to 5 pm.

    Take care,

    Catherine

  • Offline in reply to CRUK Nurse Catherine

    Thank you Catherine.

    My BCN got in touch yesterday and said she had put a formal request for another oncologist for me and that they might request to see me.

    So fingers crossed this is happening.

    I will definitely get intouch with my local maggies centre, thank you for the links 

  • Offline in reply to Jolamine

    Thank you Jolamine, my BCN got back in touch yesterday and said she'd put a formal request in for another oncologist and to be aware they might request another consultation before chemo can start as they haven't met me. I'm hoping this means I'm getting some one else!

    So sorry that you've been through similar, it's really shocking that people like that deal with people in our situation.

    I contacted my BCN a few days after my appointment and she called a cpl of days later and I told her then. That was probably over 10 days ago. I emailed to ask if she was any further on with it and got the reply yesterday. 

    Xx

  • Offline in reply to Cryptchick

    Hi Cryptchick,

    I am glad to hear that your breast care nurse has got back to you and confirmed that you'll be seeing another oncologist. I sincerely hope that this will turn out to be a better experience than your last one, but agree that this should never happen, in a situation such as this.

    Please keep in touch and let us know how you get on. We are always here for you.

    Kind regards,

    Jolamine xx

  • Offline in reply to Jolamine

    Thank you Jolamine, I really appreciate that xx

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