Be guided by what your mum wants. It's the way to make her happiest. As you say you will only be an hour and a half away, so can potentially do lots of weekend visits. You might have to take some time out later in the year or apply for exemptions if you find that your home situation is impacting on your work. Make sure you flag this up to your Uni at the start of the new year and take whatever support your Uni is able to offer in terms of course adjustments etc.

If you do find studying impossible you might have to take time out, but hopefully that won't be the case.

If your mum had expressed a wish for you to be home, my opinion might be different.

Sorry you are having to deal with this. Try to focus on making your mum as happy as possible, which means trying to calm your mind and crack on with the studying. This may actually be less pressure on her as she may feel fatigued with illness and not always want to have to try and be at her best for you. Fortnightly or monthly visits might be easier. Be guided by her energy levels and wishes.

Uni terms are actually quite short. And there should be psychological and other support available to you, plus some allowance in terms of making extra visits home if needed. 

Others on here might offer a different opinion. I actually had to repeat a year at Uni because of illness (mine rather than someone else's). So, if it is impossible for you to continue you will have to take time out. But, actually having something to distract you, may shield you a little. And I suspect that is also something your mother wants. She both wants to know she isn't holding you back, protect your from seeing her ill, and see you flourish at Uni. I think she will take great pleasure from that.

Hi Alexander22,

Thanks so much for getting in touch, I'm so sorry to hear about what is happening with your mum.

Decisions like this can feel really overwhelming and it can be impossible to know what to do for the best.  Often when we receive news like this we can feel we have to make decisions very quickly.  Do you have a summer break where you can take time to think about what you would like to do?  

Perhaps you could talk to your uni (maybe your personal tutor?) and explain the situation you are in.  They may have experience of supporting students who have had challenging situations in the past.  They will also have student support services where you could talk to someone if you wanted to, about everything that is happening.  Sometimes this can be helpful when you are trying to decide what is the best thing to do.

There is some information here about emotions you may be feeling at the moment and ways to get support.

If you want to talk things through with one of the nurses on our helpline, please do call us. Our number is Freephone 0808 800 4040 and the lines are open from 9am till 5pm Monday to Friday.

Best wishes, 

Rachel