How do I sort my daughter who has a dad with stage 4 cancer

A week ago my daughters dad was told her has kidney cancer. This week he was told its spread to his lung & lymph nodes. He is having a biopsy next week to decide what if anything can be done. He is 56 my daughter is 23. We have been separated a long time & he hasn't had the best relationship with her since we split when she was 6 years old. She is devastated & is all over the place. Mothingnibsayvto her seems to help. We are very close talk a out anything she has overcome depression anxiety in her teenage years graduates next month after completing a degree &  is starting a Masters in Seotember. She has worked so hard I don't want this to set her back. Any advice? . I'm not one for asking unusually my best friend died of cancer 8 years ago & my dad 6 years ago. I coped quite well & so did she but this is her dad. Thanks. Sian. 

Parents
  • Hello 

    What a lovely wise response from Violetegirl. 

    I wonder if there are any welfare or counselling services that your daughter can access through the university that might be helpful for her?  I think it is certainly worth suggesting this to her.  We also have a section on our website about getting help for yourself when someone you care about or know has cancer here 

    I hope these suggestion are of use.  The community here on Cancer Chat are a wonderful, supportive group of people it might be worth suggesting that she considers joining.  We are here for family and friends as well as people with cancer.

    Take care

    Martin

Reply
  • Hello 

    What a lovely wise response from Violetegirl. 

    I wonder if there are any welfare or counselling services that your daughter can access through the university that might be helpful for her?  I think it is certainly worth suggesting this to her.  We also have a section on our website about getting help for yourself when someone you care about or know has cancer here 

    I hope these suggestion are of use.  The community here on Cancer Chat are a wonderful, supportive group of people it might be worth suggesting that she considers joining.  We are here for family and friends as well as people with cancer.

    Take care

    Martin

Children
  • Hi Martin

    Thank you for the reply. I will ask her. Its early days yet we won't know what the plan is until after the biopsy next week. It frustrates me that it may take up to 4 weeks to kmow the results. Its a long time when you have been told you have a stage 4 cancer. Working in the NHS I know things take time & consultants are pushed but time isn't on the dside side of the patient when you have been told its stage 4 & 3 spread elsewhere.