Ijust hope.......his C.T. scans comeback,well, not too worrying as I really am envious of his long 8 hour sleeps.He always, thankfully never wakes and I can only lay and watch him,but he is o.k. tonight and that is what gets me through every night, but I wake up exhausted and do have alot of panic attacks, but never during the daytime, he is always happy and never moans at all unless he is in pain from something. We have had a marvellous marriage and a few ups and downs but this...is the biggest thing that is hard, but I also lost my Darling Mum to MotorNeurone Disease and she was a Nurse ,who lived through 7 years of being like "Stephen Hawking alive brain wise & myHubby says he would rather live knowing he can communicate with another person and have his cancer than live( or not really living ). Yes, cancer is a REALLY HORRID disease and everyone I know has been touched by someone who have gone through SO MUCH torment and lost many pals since was daignosed in 2011with Stage 2 Bowel Cancer.HE IS A SURVIVOR and wont ever think anything BUT being a SURVIVOR, YOU JUST HAVE TO STAY EXTREMELY POSITIVE and although I...worry constantly, he just makes the most of every single day, infact he enjoys life so much it is hard to believe that there is anything wrong with him at all. We have just moved back to Suffolk to see if we want to retire here!!! More dog walks on the agenda to Southwold - MAKE THE MOST OF EVERY SINGLE DAY and when the bad days happen, you must just take them and think of the new things in life there is...Always with his Radio in his ears listening to funny plays and the old 60's70's music that we enjoy still. I simply know he will fight it all the way and we will get even older together. Good Luck and love to you all.I hope tonight you are having an O.K. time and a peaceful sleep ,with not too much pain & look forward totomorrow, and the Spring will be here before we know it. Night night from Nica (Dolly1951).Please forgive my typing - rubbish arthritis...another fighter here!.xx
