I am currently going through near enough the same, I went through this with an abnormal smear a few years ago too. I ended up having cin 3 and had it removed. The waiting is the most terrifying part, they dont put you at ease because they cant incase there is something like cancer. My appointment letter for the removal of cells from my cervix even went as far to say there is a small chance of cancer, which i automatically concluded the worst.... why say it?!! I was convinced i was a gonna and i spent weeks leading upto the appointment like a zombie. The moment i sat down in my appointment the doctor said, dont worry its defo not cancerous, we have to state all the possibilities. I was terrified for nothing for weeks! 
 

honestly i am scared at the moment too, but it is out of my hands, find somewhere to focus your mind, tell yourself its nothing it will all be fine, its the only mindset we can have. Get worried if you need to after you find out the whole picture but not now. Ignorance has to be our bliss, its easier said than done i know but we have just got to be string and deal with it when we know. If you work for the nhs you should have access to councilling services for free though eap. My advice is get on the phone today and have a chat with a councillor, dump all of your fears out and you will feel a million times better. :-) 

Hi.

Thank you for the reply. I'm sorry to hear you've had a bad time too. I hope things are okay for you. I will contact our counselling service but I know the appointment will take a few weeks to come. I just want it all over and done with.. I'm scared of having the hysteroscopy and I am just scared in general. I feel like my life is on hold at the moment..it's a horrible feeling waking up every morning feeling anxious. I am trying really hard to switch off but it's just not working. I suffer from anxiety anyway which is worse at the moment and I feel yuck because I am no longer on HRT. Thanks again for your kind advice xx

Im scared of the hysterscopy too, but that whats the drugs are for:-) it may be a discomfort but im actually looking forward to it to hopefully put an end to all the worrying. Its ok to go into panic mode, its a natural thing to do, my councillor would always ask me to balance out a negative thought with a positive. Just take a day at a time, do what you need to to get through, even if that is taking time off work and remember we did a year of being locked down and that flew by, so a few weeks, you got this.