Thanks Jenn. I'm not sure if i'm quite ready to talk about everything i've been through. Posting on here i can stay disconnected to how i'm really feeling and while that is probably not the best way forward i really don't know how else i'm going to get through the next stage.

 
This pandemic has caused a real wrench and touched so many lives. My husband had covid in March 2020 and we really thought he might die and that was hard looking after him with 3 kids and working from home and home schooling it took its toll on everyone. Then my daughter had to have a tonsillectomy during August 2020 due to always being poorly. I had been suffering for a few months with anxiety and stress crying everyday not sleeping scared to go outside and would never go out alone and when out if i see anyone i would freeze have a panic attack and need to go home. Doctors put me Citalopram and it does help. I was able to drop my daughter off to uni in September 2020 even though i was plagued by constant worry. My bowel habits changed in me going more often my stomach was in knots all the time and it stopped me leaving the house other than when i had to go to hospital appointments. When i was diagnosed with stage 1-2 bowel cancer in December 2020 it was a shock and after surgery they discovered it was worse than they first thought being stage 3. Now awaiting chemotherapy and finding this new polyp in my cervix is just another blow. It feels like every time we get a positive treatment plan moving forward something else goes wrong. I am a very positive person always upbeat and nether think woes me, even though i have worries that i'm not destined to live a long life or beat cancer, however i know i will throw everything i have into fighting this.