I gave birth to my beautiful baby boy two months ago. Two and a half weeks ago I found a hard immobile painless lump in my breast, right near the surface (it's so prominent you can feel it through many layers of clothes). 

Initially the doctor thought it was a blocked duct, I didn't agree as there was no pain and I'd tried everything to get rid of it. He gave me antibiotics but it still didn't change so he's referred me to the breast clinic where I have an appointment this Monday. 

He told me that he's unable to reassure me that it's nothing.

I'm now completely petrified, I've convinced myself it's cancer as all the signs seem to match it and also I just have a gut feel. I had a lump before in my groin but wasn't at all worried and it turned out to be nothing so I just feel like I know. 

I'm really struggling to cope, I can't handle the idea of not being there to see my little boy grow up. 

I also have to go to the appointment alone on Monday due to Covid. 

I don't know how to handle the feelings I'm experiencing and I'm terrified as to how I'll handle having news that it's cancer, especially if it has spread.

At the moment I'm just trying to stay busy but I just keep spending ages on google or looking at my son crying.