Hi again - I don't want to say what my dad did. But it was high risk and the reason I got very high asbestos. Also I remember us sleeping in the airing cupboard for long periods when decorating was being done and the pipes my nose was up against were lagged plus there was the insulation around the boiler that we used to pick at when bored. Plus we used to literally go round picking up junk - loads of asbestos boards - and make boats and playthings in the garden. So much handling of asbestos. Not to mention the renovations cutting into walls because you didn't know, taking up asbestos floors etc. So you are not alone. Your exposure is much less than so many of us. Including all those people - boiler fitters, plumbers, decorators who worked with this stuff close up and cutting into it day after day. By the way if pipes left in attic then not something you would be breathing in daily. Just trying to reassure. But I don't think anything I could say will help. And that is why I am concerned. Because you need to be able to live again. Do feel for what you are going through. It isn't pleasant and you do have my sympathy. I have got upset myself at all my asbestos exposure in the past. But we have to move on. There is nothing we can do. Feeling cross with ourselves or our ignorance or our upbringing won't change anything. Plus lots of us also had significant cigarette smoke exposure (used to tell my parents off because I didn't like the blue air - couldn't see across the room), and the cars we were driven in had so much rust there were holes in the floor and you smelt all the fumes (used to make me feel sick), lots of lead in petrol in those days (not allowed nowadays). We can worry ad infinitum if we want. Or just say this is life. Not always ideal. But that is life. Please don't harm your body with anxiety and worry as your body can't deal with that over a long period. Really want the best for you. Lots of hugs xx

Hi Billy,

I asked a few experts who confirmed. Not just that it was literally half the house demolished and we were still living here, so it's asbestos not just pipes, but walls, ceiling, floor everything. Hence I am terrified.

I feel so sad, scared and really struggling to accept what has happened in fear of our future and also we are still living here with baby. I'm distraught 

Thank you so much. I've reached out for help, but at the moment, no matter what anyone is saying I cannot get past the fact the event has happened and put us in high risk category, not to mention my baby is living here too. I can't accept that. I want to move on, but feel with no way of knowing for certain how it's affected our health, I feel totally devastated xx

Hi - are the renovations complete now (you suggested you had gone back through old photos and I got the impression that they had been completed some years ago)? 

Please remember a lot of the guidance is aimed at protecting contractors as they work with these materials in a lot of different buildings over a large number of years. 

Get a survey done by a reputable licensed person if you need reassurance on your home now. Please do not get ripped off in panic. Concentrate on sorting now as you can do nothing about the past. I need to get some sleep now. So sorry I can't just take all your anxieties away. I have had exactly the same worries as you in the past following building works and my childhood exposures. I did manage to move on. It was all I could do. I hope that gives you some hope. I am still here and almost pensionable. Hugs and thinking of you xx

I got these extracts from HSE FAQs. Just make sure anything that is damaged goes in the correct manner. Other asbestos may be best left alone according to HSE.

If you are sure (or strongly suspect) that your home contains asbestos materials then it is often best to leave them where they are – especially if they are in good condition and unlikely to get damaged. You should check the condition of the materials from time to time to make sure they haven't been damaged or started to deteriorate.

Slightly damaged asbestos-containing materials (ACMs) can sometimes be repaired by sealing or enclosing them. However, you should only attempt to do this if you have had the necessary training.

Any badly-damaged asbestos material that is likely to become further damaged should be removed if it cannot be protected. Some materials (sprayed asbestos coatings, asbestos lagging / insulation or asbestos insulating board) should only be removed by a contractor licensed by HSE. Your local environmental health officer can provide advice on this.

Do not try to repair or remove any asbestos materials yourself if you have not had any training for non-licensed asbestos work. You can seek advice from an environmental health officer at your local authority/council (see the Directgov website). 

Environmental health might be able to advise on best way forward for you now and help alleviate your concerns. Don't get ripped off! 

By the way I live in a building with asbestos panels. It's going to cost a fortune to remove and we can't arrange as not responsible for that kind of maintenance. We live alongside them. I'd rather have a home than not. Lots of people live alongside asbestos still. It is in schools, libraries, hospitals, so many places. Contractors are the ones most at risk. Clouds of dust all through the year and year on year.

Please try to put what has happened behind you, hard though it is.

Let's get the here and now sorted and learn to live with our imperfect pasts.

I've got an absolute mouthful of mercury too - put there by my parents (my how they fed us on sweets and sugary things to keep us quiet!) I wanted all my mercury out. But the dentist told me it was best left in (and he is a good dentist). In the end I learnt to live with the mercury, though I had terrible anxiety about it for a period. 

Believe me I've had so many panics – asbestos and so much more. But life goes on! It has to.

The bigger killer is stress. So you have to deal with that side of things. And you will.

Take things a day at a time. Lots of relaxation exercises. Don't go over things in your mind constantly, especially not at night xx

Here is some information from my local council website which I hope might help put your mind at ease...

"We are all exposed to small amounts of asbestos in the air. Asbestos related diseases are typically associated with a long term workplace exposure to high levels of airborne asbestos fibres. The health risk to the public from a single exposure to asbestos is likely to be low given the short duration of exposure, and typically low levels of free asbestos fibres that may have entered the wider environment. It is unlikely that a short one-off exposure will cause asbestos related diseases."

"The additional fibre loading of the lungs from a one-off exposure to asbestos is generally considered to be insignificant when compared to the total fibre burden from background environmental asbestos fibre exposure.

The main health effect from a one-off asbestos exposure or short term low level exposure may be anxiety about potential health effects."

Thank you for the reply.

Have had a really bad few days.

We were living here through the whole demolition and renovation. And knowing that most likely in the walls, plaster, ceiling, pipes,.boiler etc etc is just too much for me to handle as to be that seems like a total fibre burden. I can't get past that 

Sorry to hear you are still finding things so very tough. But honestly there are so many who have done as you did and have ended up living to a ripe old age. 

I don't think there is anything I can say to reassure you and you will just have to find a way back to living. Meeting your concern head on, if you really believe that your life is going to be drastically cut short by this (personally I don't but I can see what a devastating impact this has had on you), then isn't that all the more reason to get back to living now. Please try and enjoy life. Don't waste it worrying. Whatever the fibre burden it would be decades before you saw an impact and your renovation didn't take 10, 20 or 30 years as is the case for those who tend to get asbestos-related conditions. So I hope you can have some moments of joy this week. Don't let anxiety and stress destroy you. Hugs xx

Thank you, I know I need to manage these feelings but it's so hard. Feel dread, sick etc. I was trying to PM you regarding something you mentioned but didn't know how to xxx

Hi -  am sorry you couldn't send me a private message. It's because I'm not set up to receive them. I have some appointments this afternoon, so am going out very soon but I can search info on the forum later to find out more about how the messaging works. Take care xx