help? anyone? im pretty messed up right now :(

Ring surgery or 111 your parents would want you to probably even insist and ring for you. Just tell them. And I speak as a parent 

I am not a doctor but it's clear you are concerned re your symptoms 

You're 20. Is there a reason why you would need to tell your parents that you need to see a GP? Why can't you just sort that out yourself (I.E just call your GP and make an appointment)? 
 

Why do you need their help to go to your GP? 

You need to see a GP. I am sure there isn't a loving parent out there who would begrudge their child making an appointment. 

Saying that, your symptoms as you have described them do sound concerning. I have no medical qualification. Why don't you call NHS 111? 
 

You say "I don't know how to tell my parents I want to see one".......er....just see one? 

Things are kind of different in our house, I'm still dependent on them a lot and because of covid 19 nobody really gets out of the house if it's not necessary.  I know it might sound dumb and weird but we're close and we usually tell each other everything. So if I need to go out I have to tell them first and explain. I'm just in a bad place right now mentally and can't find the courage to tell them and face my problem. I know the symptoms sound too concerning and I'm afraid.

Ok - two choices: 

1. Continue to ignore your symptoms and carry on as you are now (note: this hasn't worked for you so far as you have become sicker and sicker) 

OR: 

2. call your GP or NHS 111 (do whatever it takes) 

I'm not sure what anyone else can do for you here if you won't access a medical opinion. This is a cancer forum and so perhaps you could access support from elsewhere (such as a mental health support service) in order to overcome whatever it is that is preventing you from accessing the care you may urgently need. 
 

PS - I am a bit disturbed about this severe anxiety you have around telling your parents you need to see a GP. That's just...as you say, weird. Is there something else going on? I have sent you a friend request if there is anything else you'd prefer not to discuss on an open forum. If you accept it, you can message me. 

Please tell them an go pronto to a doctor-- my mum didn't tell me about her chronic pains and her symptoms of her cancer till the hospital she was at diagnosed her and she was stage 4 and too late. So please go, please get yourself looked at. You're only 20 and cancer is rare in people your age however I'd still get it checked as it might be something else that needs treating. Don't risk it hun, go get checked. I know since my mums diagnosis of cancer I am going to get every test they offer after this virus has gone away. 
 

take care x

See my anxiety is killing me right now and I'm pretty sure I'll be like your mom and diagnosed with terminal cancer. I'm just so scared right now. But like you said the sooner I go, the better. But I'll have to face reality and I don't know if I'm strong enough....