Hello

I'm so sorry to hear how frightened you are feeling. It's so natural to worry when we've lost immediate family to cancer. Hopefully your urologist will be able to provide you with the facts so you at least know what's what. The waiting can be so terrifying though. There's nothing I can say that can possibly help, but just wanted you to know that I'd read your post and am thinking of you. This forum is such an amazing place to find safe support and comaraderie, isn't it? 
 

Lily

Its a lonely cold place that you currently find yourself in,and not easy to see a way out currently. but you have at least two very good reasons to go out and find one.What has happened you can do nothing about,what will happen you can have the greatest influence upon.Stress is one of the greatest supporters of illness,positive focus is the greatest warrior you will have in your personal arsenal with which to defeat it. You will also have your army of NHS professionals that will have your back,use them wisely and to the full.

Losing your family previously was awful, but use this as the platform for you to succeed in overcoming your current problem.Those the went before us have left a legacy that has built into greater understanding  and ever increasing success in treatments, and as a survivor they sit on my shoulder as l go forward and live a full life that they made possible.

l am sorry for my inadequate words,but what l really hope is that you find yourself and come to join the many of us that have made it from the depths of despair to pinnacle of a bright shiny new day

I'm so sorry to hear about how you're feeling.   I suffer also from this kind of anxiety and am also waiting to hear about things found in a biopsy and there is also a history of cancer .....so you certainly are not alone, I know every step of your nightmare existence, I too am a natural worrier.  If you are anything like me you will be doing a whole lot of crying from fear, it is natural and I think its good to help relieve our feelings. What has helped me most is   talking to a doctor friend who said that it's a good idea to stop making things up and then worrying about what you've made up, because in real life this is actually all about doctors doing their very best to get you well.  (And (b) I know personally that not being a trained medic I don't have a clue about what I am making up anyhow. Just read a medical paper aimed at doctors and you will see what i mean....)  So I hope you will spend your time doing nice things with your kids not crying about them and good luck with your appointment. 

Hello Eviechown

im in next each sane position - I've a 5cm lump.

im so worried I've been prescribed diazepam.

its the waiting that's the worst. My mind is racing and I'm thinking/combining myself of the very worst.

be rest assured they are on the case now. My iridologist told me it looks like whatever mines is it's treatable. Don't worry too much please - easier said than done I know, but whatever it is they will deal with it xxx