Hi, a few weeks ago I found an enlarged lymph node in my armpit, I went to my GP and was given the 2 week suspected cancer referral to a hospital breast clinic.  My appointment is late on Friday afternoon and frankly I m in a terrified state.  Despite warnings on this lovely site about consulting Dr Google, I have. I also have to go back to the GPs for blood tests and she even mentioned the word Lymphoma!  You are further on and with even more agonising weeks of uncertainty, it is unbearable.  I work only two days a week but I am struggling before I even have my first appointment.  I am becoming depressed and feel guilty because my husbnd is picking up on it  and I know that he is worried.  Sods law, my hospital appointment is the day of our wedding anniversary!..  Wishing the very best and please come back and let me know how you get on. xx

Hi Christmas,

Thanks for replying.  I’m sorry to hear you too are going through this awful uncertainty.  The waiting is the worst thing.   I find the thought of something is worse than it usually is.   My appointment yesterday was okay and all the staff were amazing but I feel no further forward in a way as I still don’t know for sure.   I am having today off work and will go back tomorrow asi need to keep busy.  You need to be good to yourself and I’m sure your husband understands how scared you are.     I get the Sod’s law thing.   This year is a big birthday for me next month  and we have a holiday booked for September for our 30th Anniversary.   I think everything may change  now and feel my life is now on pause.  I’m keeping everything crossed for you for Friday and that you are able to celebrate your anniversary after your appointment  worry free.   Let me know how it goes.  Xx

It is such a comfort to have you to talk to, sharing fears and thoughts with someone in a similar situation always helps.  I also have a lovely holiday booked for the middle of September, it is special because we are going with our son who we only see a few times a year.  Now I am thinking that it may have to be cancelled.  I understand it when you say life is on hold.  I hope you get your appointment date soon and all will be well.  Will let you know how Friday goes and thank you for your kind wishes.  Lyn xx

Hi Lyn

just wanted to check in and wish you luck for today.  I’m hoping all goes well and you can get off the waiting game/life being on hold train after your appointment today.   Happy Anniversary too xx

Thank you so much MrsG, my appointment is late, 3.40,  so I am trying to fill in my time doing something, anything untl then.  Won't be home 'til quite late but I will let you know how I get on tomorrow.  Talking to someone like you in the same boat is such a comfort and a godsend. xxx 

Hi Mrs G, well my tests were surprising.  After consultation with surgeon, mammograms, and ultrasound with another doctor.  Here is what was found, the enlarged lymph gland in right armpit looks normal as does the right breast.  However the left breast shows two sites of calcification.  One looks normal the other site needs a needle biopsy next wednesday.  The doctor said they grade calcification from grade 1-5, 1-2 nothing to worry about, 3 needs further investigation 4-5 not so good.  Lymph node look normal in the left armpit. After next Wednesday  I will have to wait a week for results, so it goes on but I am relieved that that the lymph nodes appear to be normal in both armpits.  We celebrated our wedding anniversary with a bottle of champagne tonight.  I have not moved forward really because the worry has unexpectantly  changed from one breast to the other!  xxx 

Hi Lyn, sounds mostly positive news and I hope you feel a bit less anxious now that the nodes look ok.  Hopefully the biopsy next Wednesday will come back all clear but I know your mind will still be on overdrive.   One step at a time.  You are further on than yesterday I’m happy you celebrated your anniversary.   This experience has very much reminded me to live in the moment. Xxx

Hi Mrs G, I am feeling a little less anxious and will be able to function a bit more normally than the last few weeks. Going to keep busy until Wednesday and try not to overthink about it.  Worrying about work is also an issue with me, if I have anytime off, like yesterday,one of my other colleagues has to cover for me.  We each do two days a week so it means that they have to work extra days.  Anyway work should be the last of our worries, we have to think about ourselves and getting over all of this.  I will let you know how it goes next week.  I am a wimp when it comes to needles so I am not looking forward to it xx

Oh I completely understand work worries.   I took the rest of the week off to get my head together and I’m dreading what I will go back to.    I think it will be good for me to have a focus though I will have to tell my ream and I know they will be upset.  I am sure your work colleagues will understand when they eve know the reason.  Stay strong xx