Hi there! 

Oh I'm so sorry to see you're feeling so worried at the moment. It's just the worst feeling.

I have been in a similar ish position, a smear test last year showed mild changes and after a colposcopy visit and biopsies I was reassured they would likely go back to normal all on their own and no treatment was necessary. So I hadn't given it another thought since... I was then called for a repeat smear a year later which was just 3months ago, and got the result saying high grade severe changes this time and HPV positive. 

I got called in within 2days of my results and was told I'd need a LLETZ procedure. 

Luckily it was only 2 days I had to wait but in that time I read everything I possibly could on the internet and forums and managed to switch from feeling totally reassured and up beat to a total emotional wreck.

I understand you've already been through this though? And it's a year or so on? 

So I can only imagine I'll feel very similar next year if this is still going on too... it just feels like surely after going through all that it should have gone for good, right?! 

I have been warned the cells can change again even after the LLETZ treatment if the HPV virus is still there. And I have read on a lot of forums, especially on jo's cervical cancer trust, that a fair number of women have unfortunately experienced this going on for a good few years until they finally got the completely all clear. It seems that aslong as you stay in the system and get all the checks advised it's all very very treatable... just seems it can unfortunately be a stressful long process for some. 

Sorry I'm now blabbing now... 

Anyway I'm not sure I am any help but i came across your post an didnt want to leave it without a comment as I feel I can partially relate to the stress you're feeling, I do hope you have found some reassurance somewhere! If not try finding the posts on Jo's where theres other who have been through this and can hopefully reassure you :)