Hi Jolamine,

Consultant says its a case of watch and see if it returns anywhere.I`m hopeing and praying it wont.Same goes for my daughters results. She has had enough to deal with both her dad and I getting cancer.

This touches nearly every family its unbelievable.

I posted further up that I came across Shinyjewels on another thread,her diagnosis wasnt good. I think her surgery for mastectomy was to be quite soon,so she may be in hospital at present. I hope it all goes well for her.

Keep well xx

Hi Clara,

Cancer is no respector of age, creed or colour and it affects so many families. I sincerely hope that you and your daughter continue to keep symptom free.

My family is in a similar position to yours. I lost both parents to cancer and now have it myself. Unfortunately, there's nothing I can do, but just get on with it and, hope that it doesn't eventually attack my daughter too.

I am sorry to hear about Shinyjewels diagnosis and, see that she is to start chemo on 9th April. It's hard going, but, like so many before her, she'll get through it all.

Take care,

Jolamine xx

Hi Shinyjewels,

I am so sorry to hear that you didn't get good news, but I’m glad that you don’t have too long to wait to start your chemo. I know how difficult it is to have so many hospital appointments in such a short space of time and, I feel for you going through all this palaver. Still, this will ascertain the best possible treatment for you in the long run. How did your head and body scans go last Monday?

What bad timing that the start of your chemo coincides with your daughter’s first dance show. You will find it easier to cope with your situation once you have told your family, friends and school, etc. I found it much better once everyone knew. I am afraid that wearing lymphoedema bandages on both arms from shoulders to finger tips is a bit of a give-away, so nine years after my diagnosis, I am still being asked what’s wrong, when people see both arms covered in bandages. I’ve got used to it now, but it upset me at first.

Your children are young, but still have big ears and can easily overhear conversations that they shouldn’t. A simple explanation is all they need. They don’t need chapter and verse. If you are unsure how to break the news to them ask your breast care nurse if she can put you in touch with someone who could advise you how to do this. Alternatively, do you have a Maggie’s centre near you? If so, they may be able to give you some advice.

Try not to work yourself into a frenzy preparing things for the kids before you start chemo. Do you have family or friends who can help out with them whilst you are otherwise occupied?

I know that you will have a busy time this week too. After all the time spent waiting, everything now seems to be happening at once.

I shall be thinking of you on 9th and hope that it all goes well for you. Please keep in touch if you can and, remember that we are always here for you.

Kind regards,

Jolamine xx

Hi Shinyjewels,

I was so sad when I read of your diagnosis. I think we all hang onto hope that it will all turn out to be fine,but sadly thats often not the case.

Your life must be all turned upside down right now,hospitals and tests, treatment lots of info to process as well.

As Jolamine has said there is lots of info on how to tell children,friends,relatives on cruk and macmillan as well as lots on the web.

When I had my surgery a few weeks ago my daughter had not told my 7yr old grandson anything except that I had an operation. When she brought him into hospital to visit,he stopped dead like his feet were glued to the floor. At that point she realised she had not prepared him for what he would see,and it gave him quite a fright seeing all the tubes,drips, oxygen mask etc. Poor wee man!

That is really bad timimg for start of treatment on the 9th hope you can sort something for your wee girls first dance show.

I hope all goes really well with your treatment,stay strong thinking of you xxx

Hi Jolamine and Clara, thank you for your messages I did read them, it’s just been such a busy time, we are finding hard to fit in all the app’s and pick/take kids to school and my husband to work aswell. Had the group meeting at the hospital yesterday going through side effects etc, so depressing. 2 hours!! 

I find out scan results Friday but I’m hoping there is nothing else to find out as I start chemo next Tuesday, fingers crossed. 

Jolamine I’m so sorry you have to still wear bandages after all this time, did the chemotherapy cause the Lymphoedema? Sorry I still have a lot to learn !! 

Thanks for the advice about the children, that’s the bit I’m finding the hardest, we have some booklets but to be honest my nurse didn’t know much about it when I asked her yesterday :( I have got some numbers from the leaflets though. 

Sorry to hear about your little grandson, he is the same age as daughter! We were going to keep it simple to start with then elaborate as we need to. 

My husband has to go in tomorrow and tell the school, feel for him, I want to go but just the stress and I know I will just cry for the whole time so not helpful ! 

My mum and sister are helpfing next week with the children and my husband is having to take the week off work. 

Anyway thank you again for your kind words and advice. 

Xxx

Hi Shinyjewels.

Dont you worry about replying :-)

I know your whole world is turned upside down,and its all so hard to deal with.

Glad you have family around you,do take any offers of help and support, it will help you get through.

I agree keeping things as simple as possible with your kiddies,as they say slowly slowly.

Will be thinking of you,stay strong xxx

Hi Shinyjewels,

Thank you for the update. It's quite scary when you are told all the side-effects to chemo - just bear in mind that you don't have to get all of them.

I hope that your results on Friday are quite straightforward and, that there will be no further delays to starting chemo next Tuesday.

I know exactly why you don't feel up to telling the school, but I am glad that your husband is going to do this  tomorrow.

With your mum, sister and husband all helping out next week, just you take it easy. Rest or sleep when and as you need to, as you are likely to feel tired and drained.

I shall be thinking of you as you start your journey on Tuesday and hope that you can tolerate your chemo.

Don't forget to update us if you can. We are always here for you.

Kind regards,

Jolamine xx