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Elderly mum with early Alzheimer’s and suspected ovarian cancer

Shnor67
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Hi 

My mum was diagnosed with a complex mass Oct 2024 when in hospital for another illness. She refused treatment. She has suffered swollen tummy and severe heartburn and loss of appetite now and other digestive issues.End of last year diagnosed with Alzheimer’s and for the passed few months has been receiving liquid Morphine and weekly morphine patches.

she agreed this week to have biopsy and scan this week and has no memory of refusing treatment and gp said a respect form will be completed for DNR.

I want her to be comfortable and fear what the hospital may decide. Her gp told me she has 6-12 months if not treated. But to me the alternative is death from Alzheimer’s  I feel she’s in a no win situation. She sometimes understands but if I’m honest I would choose a peaceful end with pain relief than the trauma of Alzheimer's worsening. Will the hospital go through with an operation even though they suspect she may not survive it? Seems cruel and just prolonging the inevitable to me

  • Hello Shnor67

    I'm so sorry to hear about the health problems that your Mum is facing. It's clearly a difficult time for you both, and it's perfectly understandable that you want your Mum to receive the best care for her circumstances. 

    Do talk with your Mum and the health care professionals who are involved in her care about the concerns that you have. It may be that following the investigations that are planned, that they hospital feels there is no suitable treatment available for your Mum. 

    If you'd like to talk things through with one of our nurses, you're most welcome to give them a call. I know they will be happy to listen and offer any advice, information and support they can. They're available Monday to Friday 9am to 5pm on 0808 800 4040. There is also some information available on the Macmillan and Alzheimer's Society websites that may be of help. 

    I do hope that whatever decision is made regarding your Mum's treatment, that she is well supported and cared for by the relevant health professionals. 

    Best wishes, 
    Jenn
    Cancer Chat moderator 

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    Hi Shnor67,

    A very warm welcome to our forum.

    I am sorry to hear about your mum's situation. It sounds as if you are between a rock and a hard place. Do you have Power of Attorney(POA) for your mum? This allows you to make financial and medical decisions for her if she is lacking in capacity(there are 2 different forms for this - 1 for property and finance and 1 for medical). Unfortunately, this is something that she has to agree to when she has capacity, so you may be unable to get it now that she has already lost capacity.

    However, even if you don't have POA, it is worth keeping in close contact with her care team and letting them know your wishes to keep her as comfortable as possible. I very much doubt that they will go through with an operation against your wishes, especially when there is already talk of putting a DNR in place. Communication is the key here so don't hesitate to let hospital staff know what you feel in respect of having treatment. You may find out more about her condition when she has the scan and biopsy, but bear in mind that cancer treatment can lead to Alzheimer's or cause it to escalate.

    I hope that her care team can keep her pain free an afford her a peaceful passing.

    Please keep in touch and let us know how you get on. We are always here for you.

    Kind regards,

    Jolamine xx

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