Enlarged mole-2www-stages?

Hi,

I have just been referred to the hospital to have a mole on my back checked out after having several symptoms (itchy, grown, scabbed/ bleeding).

How do you know what stage it is at? I can’t feel any hard lumps in my armpits. 
Is this something that you can work out before the appointment? Or is it just a case of not thinking about it to stop the loop of anxiety?