Worried that me mum’s got skin cancer

So don’t really know where else to turn. Me mum’s 67, and has a lump on her scalp that’s grew bigger these past 6 months. She’s been to the GP on July 30th to get it surgically removed. Our GP does minor surgery’s but the GP looked at the lump and basically said I’ll need to refer you to a hospital for it to be removed and get a skin graft, since it was beyond his capabilities of removing it. But he’s put it down on the system as an emergency 2 week referral for removal and a biopsy. The doctor said he doesn’t like using the C word but he pretty much openly said he strongly suspects just by looking at it that it’s a cancerous lump. Me mum’s got the stereotypical email from the NHS saying her referral has been received and is being reviewed (July 31st). 

Now I’m sick with worry as I feel history is repeating its self. Lost me dad two years ago to possibly preventable bowel and liver cancer, since the NHS admitted to negligence by not treating him sooner as he was down on their list as a priority. Not criticising the NHS or anything just simply saying what happened.

Now after hearing her saying the GP pretty much thinks it’s cancer just by looking at it, I’m worried sick that she’s going to well die from it. I don’t know what to do, I’m the only one in my family who knows, for the time being as me sister has mental health problems so is’t being told until we have a date. It’s stressing me out big time. As I have autism and admittedly don’t have any friends to talk to, and I’m just finding myself looking up skin cancer types and all the associated treatments and survival rates. Where as me mum is just taking it casually waiting for the date to come through.

Has anyone been through this or can provide any advice about what to do, because it feels like time is going to drag 

  • Hi Coldste, 

    It's normal to worry about your mum and you have done the right thing in coming here to share your worries about your mum. Your mum did the right thing going to the GP especially given that the lump on her scalp has grown bigger and very often GPs can't remove these themselves so it's completely standard practice that they have referred this for more specialist treatment so that it can be removed, biopsied and looked at more closely. It's good that it has been fast tracked so she should not have to wait too long to be seen. What happened to your dad is very sad and it must have left a mark on you so it's normal that this is making you anxious - I am so sorry your dad passed away as a result of not being treated sooner but this really does not mean the same will happen to your mum. First, you are not dealing at all with the same type of cancer if it was to be cancer so try not to anticipate the worst. Your mum is in very good hands. It must be hard for you to be the only one who knows and I can completely understand you want to protect your sister at the moment until you have a little bit more clarity as to what is going on and what your mum's diagnosis is. 

    You are not alone here and I hope that you will hear from other members of our community who have been in a similar place so don't hesitate to come and write on here anytime you feel down about this. Sometimes just writing things down makes us feel better and this is what the forum is for. I think your mum's approach is the right one if you can manage to follow her example, taking one day at a time and waiting for the appointment date to come through. Try and resist the urge if you can to look up all the skin cancer skin types as there are so many different kinds it would be a bit like looking for a needle in a haystack. There is also a lot of unreliable information available on the internet so you could be scaring yourself completely unnecessarily. If you want to stick to reliable information you can trust, you can read our information on skin cancer but don't get too invested in it and try not to really look at things too closely until you have a definite diagnosis or you would only make yourself more anxious without getting any satisfactory answers. One thing I would recommend is following our coping strategies when waiting for important news.  As you say and you're completely right, it will feel like time is dragging and this is a feeling many members of our community will have also experienced before so I hope our little tips will help you and your mum get through each day until her appointment. 

    Keeping everything crossed for your mum - I hope she finds out more soon and that it all goes well with the removal of this lump on her scalp. Keep us updated if you get a chance on how things progress for her. 

    Best wishes, 

    Lucie, Cancer Chat Moderator