Hi. 

New here and just looking for anything right now to ease my anxiety a little!

Last October, I was rushed to hospital for other reasons which resulted in a CT scan being performed of my abdomen and pelvic area. This scan picked up on a 4cm ovarian lesion which got me a referral onto gynaecology. 

I had my appointment with them last week, where I explained about my symptoms of constant cramping all across my pelvic area, constant lower back pain, irregular, heavy cycles, bleeding between periods, pain during sex and changes with bladder and bowel plus discharge from my left nipple only. 

The gynaecologist went over my ultrasound results (which I had 1 week prior to the appointment), they believe the lesion to be a dermoid cyst and are opting to remove along with a polyp that the ultrasound shows is in the lining of my womb. I had an overdue smear test done too. She then sent me to have bloods taken to check my hormones, prolactin and ca125. 

I received a letter today stating that my smear has come back HPV positive with high-grade severe dyskaryosis and I've been referred for an urgent appointment next week for a colposcopy to see what it going on.

I'm terrified. I've known something isn't right for a long while now (years!) and due to mental health problems and agoraphobia I haven't been able to seek help for myself when I've needed it. I'm jumping to the worst conclusions understandably, especially as I have female cancers prevalent on both sides of my family. I'm only 35 but I've been having periods since the age of 9 and 9 pregnancies with 6 children, my first at just 15. I know my risks are higher anyway which is just adding to the spiral! I need to wait on the blood test results before I can move on and make a GP appointment for the issues with my breast too. Feels like everything is coming apart at once.

Not sure what I'm looking to gain from this post but I don't have friends or family I can talk to besides my husband and he's already worried enough about me with all the recent medical events going on! I think any similar experiences good or bad would be much appreciated and just being able to get this out somewhere has already helped to ease some of the fear.