23 Female. 

I feel so stupid. So so so stupid and scared and I’m just so angry at myself.  Since January 2023 I noticed blood in my stool, not mixed in but always on the surface or in the toilet paper. Sometimes it would be quite a lot and make the toilet water red and sometimes it would drip down. And ignored it and I can’t believe I could be so incredibly stupid. I ignored it. I’ve not led a good lifestyle and would often have fluctuating bowel moments between normal, constipated and diarrhoea and would sometimes be straining to out the bleeding down to that and never got it looked at.

as of last year I would notice it off and on more often, again never got it looked at. Again put it down to bad diet and not much fibre etc, always put down to hemorroids or fissures and so forth. I had a fecal calprotectin test November 2023 for different reasons which came back all good. As a side note. 

more recently I had some abnormal blood work and have been under investigation for fatty liver and also an enlarged spleen which I have to see a hemotologist for and I am so so so scared and feel terrified at the possible outcomes. My blood tests showed high white blood cells and high lymphocytes as well as my RBCs being wider than normal and my basophil were also elevated. I’m now terrified this is all going to be linked back to colon and I’m going to be told I have colon cancer. 

I have since in the last week finally seen a dr about it. She did an inspection and felt inside. She said I did have a bulbous external helorroid and could also see a fissure but couldn’t feel anything inside. She didn’t seem concerned and ssaid I was too young for something like colon cancer which I know isn’t necessarily true. She gave me another calprotectin test and a FIT test which I have sent both of and I’m just really really scared. 

I should also mention that since I have cleared up my diet and starting eating healthier, including more fruit and veg in my diet and more water I have not had any visible bleeding for 3/4 weeks now. I don’t know whether to be ressurred by this or not. 

overall I’m just really really scared that I’ve been so stupid and ignored obvious signs and Joe I’m going to find out I have advanced colon cancer or something like that.