Waiting on breast biopsy results - heads a mess

Hello everyone.

Ive never really posted on anything like this before but I just feel so lost and scared right now I thought Id see if there is anyone else out there feeling the same. 
Im 36, beautiful son and hubby. Couple of weeks ago was doing my fake tan, noticed just the slightest of dips in my left breast (bottom outer corner). I was due on my cycle so left it a few days encase it was something related and when it didnt go I made an appointment with my GP. They couldn't feel anything but made a referral to the breast clinic based on asymmetrical breasts. 
So I head to the clinic, consultant has a feel and agrees on the dip and can feel a lump underneath it. This then leads them to book me in as urgent for the following day but for a biopsy, mammograms and so on. So I have the mammograms done, they take multiple images. Wait again to head into the consultation room with 2 student nurses, the consultant, a Ultrasound tech and a nurse. They start talking about the lump and identify another one but at this point Im a bit numb and not really taking it all in. I have the biopsies done and then the consultant speaks to me, here is where Im upset at myself as I cant remember the exact wording (my head was and is a mess) but something along the lines of “Concerned” or “Suspecting” malignancy. It was all so fast though. I had titanium chips popped in over the two lumps tested then sent back out for another mammogram to confirm their placement and booking me in for an MRI. During the last mammogram I felt so stupid, I was almost literally frozen as every muscle was so tense and I just couldn't stop trembling. The poor technician was trying to get me to relax but I just couldn’t 
I feel so lost, so scared and to be honest completely blindsided and I don't know if Im just being a big baby or if this is a normal reaction to it all. Has anyone experienced something similar and its come back as benign? Im praying it comes back benign but their reaction and way they are speaking has made me feel like they already know it’s cancer. Then I spiral thinking oh god what if its spread already? And the littlest pain anywhere is making me so paranoid.
Im so grateful to my GP and hospital for moving so quickly, the other half just feels terrified. 
Sorry for the long rambly post and thank you for reading, I just feel like Im free falling right now x

  • Morning lovely!! Thank you. You too I hope today goes well! Xxxx

  • Thank you :-) xxx

  • Remember you can deal with what you know. Sending strength x

  • Thank you xxxx

  • Oh gosh, just took a call from the consultants secretary now. They still want to see me today but wanted to let me know ahead of the meeting that I may not get all of the answers today but will talk me through my options. What does that even mean??? Has anyone else had this? I feel so sick that this means they have found something else on the CT or MRI. I have a feeling the MDT meeting just took place before them calling me but I have absolutely no idea what this could mean at all. Xx

  • Try not to panic. Keep calm and level headed so you can take it all in and ask the right questions if needed.  It might mean that not all results are in but they don't want to delay the meeting. Let us all know how you get on. 

    I'm still waiting for my oncotype dx results, but my appointment letter confirms that the cancer was Grade 3 and not grade 1 as I was told at the biopsy results. So they don't get all answers from these initial tests anyway. It's still all investigative.  Xx

  • Thank you, god I hope so. Its just such a *** time isnt it. I was really hoping on some answers today and just some sort of reassurance no matter how small. Oh lovely have they given you any idea when your results will be in? Xx

  • Ever since 5th August they've been telling me the results will be anyday now (they are sent to 1 lab in the USA). I asked if there was a chance it was lost (as I was told on 5th that one sent the same day as mine was back) and they said they'd only chase it on Monday and the results can take 3 weeks. They sent it after the MDT on 25th July

  • Oh lovely thats rubbish your having to wait. 25th brings it to pretty much 4 weeks now! Praying it comes back soon for you and with a nice low score so you wont need chemo. Its a emotional minefield, if your anything like me you have been mentally trying to prep for these results from the second the timer started and any delays just feels almost cruel although cant be helped. Me and my husband said to eachother yesterday “well atleast tomorrow we should get some answers” then took that call this morning but with no context to what information they can or cant say yet, you cant help but immediately go to the worst :-( x

  • Hi all, I'm home now, all done until 30th, bit of stinging at first for the magseed, then mammogram to check it was OK. Then over to main hospital and get pre op done. Spent more time waiting to get blood taken...absolutely shattered from being up early. Rambleon88 I hope you get the answers you need in light of the call you got earlier....thinking of you xxx

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