The wait!

Hiya, I am new here and looking for some reassurance. My partner (M31) found a lump in my (F37) boob about 2 months ago, We are a new couple and I have no idea how long its been there. I ignored it to start with because my mums going through Cancer treatment and I think I just freaked and decided that was the best thing to do. Partner encouraged me to get it seen and I have been referred for a 2ww. Obviously with easter etc its taking a bit longer but my app is next Tuesday (9th) And I think I am going crazy in the mean time. I am not sleeping, barely getting a few hours at night, and what I do get isn't a good quality. I work from home as an author and I have struggled to do any work. I am either eating everything or throwing everything up. My skin is dreadful! My fibro has kicked in which sucks as I haven't had a flare up in nearly 4 years. And the mood swings lord help him and my teen! I am either crying, laughing or angry! I swing so quickly.

This relationship is new, and I am struggling with the intimacy now, because I don't feel sexy or cute, I feel like an exhausted Pigeon! 

I guess I am wondering if anyone else struggled like this, and any tips to pull myself through it, because I don't want to lose the relationship but I am not ready to lean on him for support too much!

Thanks all X

  • Hello Salukimumma

    I'm sorry to hear that you're currently waiting for an appointment at the breast clinic. It's understandable that you're feeling worried. 

    We know that for many people this period of waiting and uncertainty can be a really difficult time. It's natural that you're stressed and anxious but it may help to keep in mind that the large majority of people who are seen in breast clinics are not diagnosed with cancer. Keeping a positive mindset really can help with this period of waiting.

    In terms of your relationship, it's understandable that you have insecurities and worries particularly as this is a relatively new relationship. From your post, it sounds as if your partner has been supportive so far so it may be a good idea to have a chat with them about how you're feeling. It's very possible that they have concerns as well and it may be that the two of you can offer each other some reassurance about things and hopefully draw closer to each other. 

    If it would help to talk things through with one of our nurses ahead of your appointment next week you're welcome to call them. I know they will be happy to offer any advice, information and support they can. They're available Monday to Friday 9am to 5pm on 0808 800 4040. 

    Hopefully when you see the specialists next week they will be able to give you some answers and reassurance. Do keep in touch Salukimumma and let us know how you get on. 

    Best wishes, 
    Jenn
    Cancer Chat moderator