Hi everyone.

Had an appointment with a thoraxic surgeon yesterday because of some pain and discomfort I have been feeling in the last month in my left upper chest (it's mainly armpit discomfort during the whole day).

He didn't said much but seemed worried, specially after he asked me to take my shirt off and noticed that my left chest is swollen?/higher? (not sure this is the right way to described it) than the right one, and sent me immediately for a CT scan of my chest and booked a follow up appointment in 2 working days.

I was a bit surprised because of how fast things went tbh. In less than 1 hour, I went from being in the waiting room, to a CT scan room and out of the clinic.

I suffer from anxiety (medicated for the last 10+ years) and have the horrible urge to search for questions myself... I didn't asked a single question about what he was thinking it could be.

So, I googled his name and came across a medical publication he authored about pentecostal tumors. The symptoms are very much like what I have been suffering:

- pain/discomfort in the chest/armpit

- weird sensations in my arm

- no cough or breathing issues, which seem to be usual in these type of cancers

Well.. this lead me to a downward spiral since then/yesterday. The period between leaving the clinic and get home was a bit blurry. I know the area and how to get from A to B, but had to ask for help because I couldn't figure out which train to get.

I had multiple scares in the past, but this one seems different. There is clearly something wrong with me, too much smoke smoke without fire. The thought that is can be a serious illness is mentally crushing me.

I don't expect reasurance replies/comments from this post. I just wanted to write it out there what I feel atm.