Hi everyone, I wondered if anyone can help me as I'm very worried.
 

After my first smear 9 years ago I had CIN3 cells treated and then a normal smear. My next smear was normal too. Then they changed the rules and would only look under the microscope if a patient had HPV (which I didn't) so my 2019 smear wasn't tested under the microscope. I was anxious about this but my doctor at the time said that most cervical cancers are caused by HPV and it's only rare ones which aren't, which would be visible to the doctor when performing an examination, which is probably why I'm so concerned about the situation today.

I'm currently trying to conceive my second child and have been experiencing different periods for over a year. They are regular but I have days of stop start spotting, then 2-3 days of full flow and then some more spotting meaning my period lasts for about 10 days in total. 
 

I've had ultrasounds in the past which came back fine, I've had day 3 and day 21 tests to check my hormone levels and they came back fine and showed I'm ovulating. 
 

I had a very small amount of pink blood after sex in September which the doctor said was from a slight cut/tear and nothing to worry about. I had swabs taken for STDs etc at the time and they came back fine. 
 

Over the weekend I had a very minuscule amount of pink when I wiped after sex. It was a blink and you'd miss it amount. I went for a chat with the doctor today and she did an examination except it was so uncomfortable due to my phobia of examinations that she had to stop and kindly prescribed some diazepam and said I could try again this afternoon. She said she didn't get a good view but thought I had an ectoprion. I went home and went to the loo and when I wiped there was pink blood. I went back this afternoon and was able to tolerate the examination and swabs after having the diazepam. The doctor said she could see I had what looks like an ectoprion but due to my anxiety she would refer me urgently to colposcopy to check it is this as they could get a better view. She said I would be seen within 2 weeks so I am hoping I will be seen before Christmas. The doctor said that I would probably bleed after this examination. Nothing like this suspected ectoprion was noted on my September examination.

My anxiety is out of control because I am so concerned about the possibility of cervical cancer given I am really wanting to have more children. I asked if I need to refrain from sex and the doctor said no. Later however she suggested I do refrain in case I am pregnant and require treatment. The doctor said she thought it was very unlikely it was anything cancerous. I'm terrified however about whether it could be anything sinister. I'm also scared about how I will manage to get through the colposcopy since when I went 9 years ago they had to put me under general anaesthetic to treat me.