Hi Jworrier, I’m sorry about your worrying news. I don’t know anything specifically about thyroid cancer, but the husband of a good friend of mine has just been diagnosed and is waiting for surgery so I can see what they’re going through. But you asked about something to help you to cope so perhaps I can reply to that question. I think it’s normal to be upset and worried and to feel like crying so I think first of all I wouldn’t feel guilty about that. Sometimes perhaps we need to “be strong” for those around us but (I don’t know how old you are) there was the song “It’s my birthday and I’ll cry if I want to”, this is no birthday obviously but it’s happening to you not to those around you and you need to feel free to express how you feel.

If it is specifically the surgery that is worrying you, perhaps you could write a list of all the specific questions you have, precise things that are worrying you. Sometimes it helps to write our very worst fears on a piece of paper and look them in the eye. Then perhaps see if you can find some of the answers, not on Google, but you could contact the cancer nurse who is following you? Or your GP’s surgery saying you need to talk about this with someone. It isn’t true that no support is available because of Coronavirus, my dad’s surgery rang him yesterday just to ask how things were going and if he needed support. I’m ignorant of the workings of the NHS but it does seem that some support is available. Or ring the specialist team that’s following you. If everything is moving so quickly you must be in good hands.

Sometimes we have more personal resources than we think. We’ve all just been through, and still are, the pandemic, so what coping mechanisms did you put in place during lockdown for example  - another time of waiting, worry, fear and total uncertainty about the future. Can some of those be useful to you now? Apart from that, we are all different, some things which have helped me to cope……

Every morning when you wake up, as soon as the thought of ‘it’ arrives, think of something pleasant and enjoyable you can add in to your day, a small treat, it’s not the time for binge drinking or eating, but perhaps something special you wouldn’t normally allow yourself which you particularly enjoy, to eat, to do, to go to, so that every evening you can think well, today I didn’t let it beat me, I did this which was nice….

I imagine you’ve read all about deep breathing, meditation and all that. Personally I haven’t’ been able to do that sort of thing although I know many people find it useful. But a brisk walk, better if in a park or in nature can work up some positive hormones to react more positively, more than retreating to bed or the sofa.

In all the worst situations of my life I’ve found it useful to just totally switch off for a couple of hours a day, so to watch a great film (comedy or thrillers, preferably something you’ve enjoyed in the past) or get absorbed in a book (harder because the mind wanders) or even to think about work can be time out from worrying.

Anyway, I’m thinking of you. Best wishes