Hello Pompeyperson, 

By now you will have had your PET/CT scan but I am not sure whether they will have told you more yet so I wanted to wish you the best of luck for your appointment with the consultant tomorrow. Hopefully you will get some answers tomorrow and some clarity as to what this unknown cancer might be. It's normal to be struggling after being told this devastating news and you may feel that it is really hard to find the right words to talk to your 10 year old. I think you are absolutely right to wait until you see the consultant and you know what you are dealing with before you talk to your son. It's a good idea to wait until you feel ready yourself and you think the time is right. Our website contains useful information on talking to children about cancer which I hope you will find useful. It mentions valuable resources such as books you can read to your children or for older children to read themselves. It's hard to know how to broach the subject with them but you will often find that children are very good at listening and at being adaptable so I hope that it all goes well. 

I will slightly edit your title if you don't mind to include the words 'telling your child' so that other members who have had to have this difficult conversation with their child can see your thread more easily and share their tips based on their individual experiences with you. 

I will be thinking of you tomorrow and wish you the best of luck for your appointment with the consultant - keep us updated if you get a moment as to what they say.

Keeping everything crossed for the best possible outcome! 

Best wishes, 

Lucie, Cancer Chat Moderator

Thank you Lucie for your kind email. 

I wasn't told anything more yesterday and wasn't really expecting to. I am feeling sick at the thought of what the consultant will tell me tomorrow. 

You're right about feeling ready to tell my child. I dont know if I will feel ready or even able to tomorrow but I feel a bit pressured because my MIL lives with us. Originally we said we would tell them together but I fear my MIL's reaction will be tears and wailing and the truth is I don't want her to scare my child with her reaction. But my husband may tell her tomorrow while I am at work (I need to go to work to distract myself before the hospital appointment).

I know I am probably misplacing my focus but she will tell my SIL and I don't want my husband's family knowing before my child. But I honestly don't know if I will be ready to tell my child tomorrow after the appointment.

Thank you the link. I will look at it now and I will update after the appointment.