Breast cancer in the left breast diagnosed a month ago.

Today I had a meeting with my consultant/surgeon & plastic surgeon. My previous meeting we talked about the options of a breast reconstruction and my surgeon was confident that we could achieve a satisfactory result.

Today I got the results of my mri which shows the tumour at the top of my left breast but also several smaller lumps scattered around the outer half of my breast (areas tested positive also when biopsied). Some of these lumps are close to the skin. Both surgeon and plastic surgeon have said that reconstruction now is highly unlikely & I am devastated. I am very slim and muscular & have no body fat to take from anywhere. We discussed taking muscle from my back but the surgeons said that because of my size there were some serious risks including to my upper body mobility. As I do a physical job & on their advice I have ruled this option out. My surgeon has said there's a small possibility of inserting a Becker but again because of my size & thin skin won't know if this is a viable option until I'm on the operating table.

I have been denied a double mastectomy as an option to a) stop the worry of cancer in my other breast & b) being able achieve some sort of symmetry. My operation has been set for October 26th.

I don't know how to get my head round this & deal with it all. I'm a young looking 47 & have always looked after my body & now im facing a mastectomy, chemo & radiotherapy. My mood is very low & dark. I'm not coping very well.

any advice appreciated